


Boys You've Got another one - Sherlockian Meta

by Howlynn



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: #reichencrack, ACD Canon, Angst and Humor, Arthur Conan Doyle Canon References, BAMF John, BAMF Mary Morstan, Big Brothers, Brotherly Love, Character Analysis, Charles Augustus Magnussen Being Creepy, Creepy Moriarty, Episode: The Abominable Bride, Evil Mary Morstan, Fan theory, Filling plot holes with a shovel, Good Mary, Good Parents John & Mary, Hero Complex, Humor, I Believe in Sherlock Holmes, It's all canon, Johnlock Roulette, Just Friends, Mary's Past, Meta, Moriarty Is A Dick, Moriarty is Alive, Moriarty is Dead, Mycroft Being a Good Brother, Mycroft IS the British Government, Mycroft's Meddling, On the spectrum with some psychopaths, Pining Sherlock, Platonic Sherlock Holmes/John Watson, Plot Devices, Protective Mycroft, Relationship Discussions, Sad Sherlock, Sarcasm, Sarcasm is affection, Sherlock Being Sherlock, Sherlock Holmes and Feelings, Sherlock Series 3 Spoilers, Sherlock's Violin, Sherlock-centric, Spoilers, Stupid stuff nobody notices, TJLC | The Johnlock Conspiracy, They did tell you this was a fairytail!, This Is STUPID, Weird Plot Shit, plot holes, the devil is driving
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-08
Updated: 2018-02-20
Packaged: 2018-05-12 12:52:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 40,659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5666746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Howlynn/pseuds/Howlynn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Well, this is basically a ramble, inspired by a very angry person who believes that discussing any view but hers is somehow rude to her.  So - I took her at her word and decided to toss some ideas out there and if you don't like them or see things in a different way - I am all about the fun of discussion.  This is how I perceive some things on this show. To begin - a monograph on why Mary is not necessarily a good person but that she isn't an evil ogre either.  I will see how this goes and if I get a few sane people who also like to share ideas rather than spew vitriol then we will continue on with such topics as Mycroft is an unsung hero and John is not a cuddly man.  Please feel free to disagree but just keep it in the realm of decorum.  Thanks for reading.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Why we should love Mary (or not)

Boys…you’ve got another one… Sherlockian meta

 

Chapter 1 - Why we should like Mary.

 

 

Okay - take me with a grain of salt here - just throwing some thoughts out there for the fun of discussion.

I find that there is a trend to Make Mary a horrible person simply for the ease of bringing Johnlock about. That is fine but really – it is too simple and if you want to give your story some Whump – WHY make that such an easy fix. 

Torture your babies!

Don’t make Mary a one dimensional evil ogre. It’s fine for the short smutty stories because you don’t have to explain volumes to get to the kissing, but if you are writing works over 10k words – making Mary a toss away is a bit lazy.

I have been accused of being soft on Mary, and that may be true, but I think everyone else is missing a world of cool Mary angst. They either write her as a Mary-sue with a gun or she is Moriarty’s evil twin topping from the bottom.  

Do you really see Mary as pure evil?

How boring.

  Devil’s advocate –

 First of all, we are all so very worried about Sherlock's two years of bad stuff yet there is very little compassion for Mary having a whole career of it.  I think pure evil Mary is too simple. She has a past that she left behind.  She left it behind five years ago – we know this because Sherlock tells us in the empty house. 

 **Oh but she kept her gun and that means she was just pretending?** No – but thank you for playing.

Mary kept her gun because protecting herself is second nature. I live in the states right now and I have more than one and so did my mother – girls like guns too.  Mary could run into her past at any second.  She would have to be an idiot to contemplate that thought unarmed and unprepared.  It is no absolute that she is doing wet work just because she has the tools. 

I have a kitchen full of stuff to bake sweets and puddings and I don’t eat sugar – having does not equate using.

How does that five year thing relate to our time line? She is hiding before she met John. 

(Not the best move to fall for a celebrity who posts pics of you online- but we all do silly things?)

Now that isn’t to say that she’s lost her ability. But, for five years, she has basically retired or at least had this identity.  That means she got it before any of the Moriarty timeline.  Doesn’t mean he could not have been the one to get her out – but nice guy he is not. 

Moriarty changed his plan. How do I know this?

He was first trying to get Sherlock’s attention. “We are made for each other.”  What changed?

First – John Watson. John put Sherlock on the side of the angels.  Before John – he could have been wooed away from the side of the law. 

Second – He was enjoying his game and then he suddenly owed Sherlock a ‘FALL” That was emphasized.  He was not playing any more.  Something had changed.

Let’s look at that a bit. What IS Moriarty?

Mostly, he is a con man. He is also rather bi-polar.  The over the top joy to the darkest hatred and depression.  Moriarty sold the idea that he had a computer code that he did not have.

He had planned on getting Sherlock to help him. (yes there is a mathematical puzzle out there that could shut down all computers if it were solved – so theoretically with Sherlock’s mother being a Mathematician – Sherlock would be aware of it and capable of solving it if he could get him interested in the puzzle.)

But Sherlock betrays Moriarty and doesn’t follow his pied piper temptation – what does that cause?

Well – Moriarty is suddenly Mr Sex – And he has sold an Idea to every horrible monster in the world and NOW – he sitting there with his pockets empty. Who is to blame for his plan failing?  He’s a narcissistic psychopath so HE IS NEVER Ever, ever, ever to blame.

Moriarty can only pull off his subterfuge for so long. Shift the blame to Sherlock.  “Last one to Sherlock is a sissy.”

I gave it to Sherlock. Kill him.  (Sherlock let him down  - he was not dazzled when Jim offered him the whole world for the taking.  What an ego killer?  Sherlock would rather be with boring nobody John Watson then rule the world with Jim.  That Jim, who feels nothing, should fall for Sherlock and NOT be able to Make him want what Jim wants – well…….Jim has bet everything on this mess and he knows he is going to fall – the best he can get now is to make Sherlock fall with him.)

How do I support that?

Jim seems to have a great deal of time on his hands to mess with the head of one little London detective. Jim is an international criminal.  Sherlock is a small fish in a small pond in comparison.  Why would Jim have so much time to devote to an annoying little Freak?  

That can be explained by Magnussun. Own Sherlock and you own Mycroft.  Mycroft has his fingers in the world pie and would be very useful to Moriarty.  Sherlock won’t play.  All of Jim’s schemes are about to topple and someone will eventually get him. (Ugh probably in a horrible way considering Jim evidently skinned people who displeased him – something to look forward to don’t you imagine?)  That is Sherlock’s fault in Jim’s mind.

Or. Jim has lost his mind pining for Sherlock and with every human on the planet bowing and scraping to Jim – the one thing he wants more than anything is the something he can’t have – i.e. Sherlock by his side.

Jim is between a rock and a hard place. On top of that he has been rejected.  He owes Sherlock. 

(Love is such a vicious motivator)

His only way out is to die. But his ego will not allow him to be defeated.  He wants the romance to be real and it isn’t but if he can make people believe it, that is almost as good. “You have to admit this is a lot sexier”  His legend – His fairytale.  I shot myself in the head and Sherlock was so devastated that he threw himself off a building – Romeo and Juliet – must be true – it was in all the papers? 

Why does he thank Sherlock? You’re me?  Bless you.  (You made my last moments happy.  You will die in disgrace with me – I can’t ask for a better ending.) Besides the fact I have forced you, you have actually become as evil as I ever was and we will be together for all time- shaking hands in hell- consorting in the afterlife -  Together forever in the minds of the living. In Jim’s mind - even if you don’t play the swan – you have just killed everyone you love and it will turn you into me.  Either of those two options are a win to Jim.   

Mary was not John’s sniper – Strangely, Mycroft got ahold of him right away if that scene was real and not just John’s imagination. (Each of the three ‘Way he did it’ scenes had very big holes so it could be none of them were real – the way the third one is cut – from John about to die to Anderson’s apartment back to John on the train – makes it look like that explanation is all in John’s Mind – Plus he later asked if Sherlock was going to tell him how he did it – and Sherlock replies – ‘You know my methods, John.’  So John must have not seen Andersons tape because it was not real?)  Still – Mary didn’t Shoot John when he came back – or while he was Shaving – or on the sex holiday – or when she was in Magnusson’s office/bedroom Shooting the Sherlock.

If Mary was just plain evil – why didn’t she shoot Sherlock and Magnussen and her supposed target – John. She could have made her get away – played the grieving widow sucking up tons of sympathy and never been suspected?  (perfect narcissist behavior – wouldn’t make for much of a show though)

Maybe?   Because she actually loves John more than herself?  (Naw – that makes getting rid of her too hard?  Except it really doesn’t) 

Mary dies in canon. We all know it is coming.  Let’s make her do stuff that make people adore her and then kill her?  She could have a hero’s death and won’t that tear people’s heart out?  (Sounds a whole lot more like certain un-named writers who love to twist canon?)  In canon – Mary’s death is accidental and almost a non-event.   What a waste of perfectly good angst and horror.

 

 

 

So Mary could be just plain horrible and evil…

But- it isn’t enough.

 Is it just that she makes getting Sherlock and John together rather complicated? (Is that what it is about?)

 What has she done (other than Shooting the Sherlock- bad girl) that is so bad? (we don’t know – and Magnusson was toying with his prey – Bad girl)

We don’t know what CAM actually knew –‘ so many dead people’ doesn’t mean she slaughtered a convent – (Sorry headless nuns and holes in her habit – I had to go there- lol)

All of those dead people could have been murderers and Moriarty types – we don’t know. (But Mycroft had not made her disappear so there must be some redeeming twist to her story)

Well we do know some of them must have been not nice people because Charles knows the names of people who would come to murder her and anyone she loves? Probably not local church deacons and tree-huggers then?

So why should we like Mary? She talks down to our lovely-sweet-kind –caring-perfect John.  LOL – you may want to take a closer look at Doctor Watson – He is a man with some issues in reality. 

Save John for later and back to Mary.

  If she had not come into John's life when she did - would he have been here when Sherlock returned?

Yeah – we know John was suicidal in SIPink. So he cut’s off all contact even with Mrs. Hudson!  Isolating himself is a sign of contemplating suicide.  (it is subtle- but it is there) When did he come back?  When he had something new to live for.  He came to tell Mrs. Hudson.

 (AGGGH loved her shock that it was a woman – She HAD seen his parade of girlfriends – Something happened while Sherlock was away that gave her no doubt whatsoever that John was IN LOVE with Sherlock – that was spectacular!!!  Hehehe – how often is Mrs. Hudson completely wrong?  She is their parental wisdom unit.)

John says Mary turned his life around. Saved him.  We have to like her for that.  Why save someone if you plan to kill them?  

 When John told him to Ff-cough Mary seemed to be the one who got them back together. 

Poor Sherlock – Mary saved him from his lonely sad johnless life. She shared. (have to like her for that too)

She didn’t have to do that. She could have ramped up his hatred for Sherlock – fed his anger – made sure this rival stayed far away from her property.  But she didn’t do that.  She welcomed Sherlock.  She ran to him for help to save John. (She may be Bamf but she knows when she needs help too – that is very cool)  She liked him so we liked her. 

She came up with a plan – include Sherlock in the wedding planning. When John sees how much Sherlock will put up with just to be around John – John will forget he’s pissed off and will forgive his friend.  She proves the three of them can be a team.  (I love that she’s bonded with Sherlock and pushing John to give him what he needs – you need to run him – Sherlock is now John’s pet – did you pick up on that?  John was Sherlock’s pet before)

 

Then she turns around and points a gun at Sherlock and the tide turns. How dare she lie to us.  That cold hearted witch just Shot our Sherlock! 

Oh- but we loved it – dead Sherlocks always make us scream/cry/want to kill something.

 

Make our heart stop Mr. Moffat and we will curse you whilst watching it a dozen times.  

Do we blame Mary for wanting to Shoot Charles?

 He was blackmailing her in the first place and by God - he tried to burn John alive.  What if she knew before the rest of them that it was him?

  Do people think about what that would have been like if Sherlock had not saved John?

 Imagine Sherlock knowing that someone had taken John right from under his nose and burned him alive (Burn the heart out of him literally) while crowds laughed and celebrated and cheered?

 Sherlock would have burned the bloody world to avenge that and we would have been with him.   But we are horrified that Mary might feel that. 

So back to Mary shooting Sherlock. You have to look at the position she was in purely from a tactical standpoint.   She can’t point a gun at them both at the same time.  Neutralize the biggest threat – Charles is on his knees – Sherlock is a fellow operative and the most dangerous – and who keeps bloody advancing on her. 

 When you realize she is a hormonal person who is falling back on their training - is it so unbelievable?

 She is at a disadvantage suddenly and it would be natural (necessary) to regain control of the room. Sherlock could have stayed still and talked - but he pressed his advantage and it was an aggressive action to her.  (She was kind of an idiot not to have killed him) except that John would have not been distracted if he'd found dead bodies.  If Sherlock were dead he would have quite possibly gone after the killer. 

Now- we know she got in a different way. Somehow, Mary knew Charles was still at home despite his dinner plans.

 (Why did Janine let Sherlock come up if she knew her boss was still there?  Because Charles told her to?  He wanted Janine to be an extra pressure point for Sherlock? While CAM is flicking John's face, he mentions that he has treated Janine like (recently more than likely) this then judges Sherlock's obvious reaction to the information - so that backs up my thoughts a bit.)

How did Mary get through 14 layers of security? (My guess is she did as the Chinese acrobats did and scaled the building.  Maybe a helicopter but that would speak of Government help.) So if she killed Sherlock, then John would be hot on her tail - She would be repelling and he could have seen her - taken the express elevator and been waiting for her on the ground - so Shooting Sherlock in a way that death was not instantaneous was her only option. 

Why did she not kill Charles? She should have killed all three of them if her own safety was the only thing that mattered.  If she were pure evil – John was just a cover or a target then this would have worked out swimmingly. 

Maybe Charles had already convinced her that he was not going to be a threat to her? No – people will say anything to save their own skin.  She’s no fool.  Maybe she was after more than her own credentials?  She didn’t know he didn’t have paperwork- or info that could be found.

OR – did she?

Wasn’t it convenient that Mary wobbles along in her secret life with a flash drive that would put her in jail at the very least? The Agra box?  (In canon- it was empty of course)  What if Sherlock interrupted a successful mission?  What if she already had what she’d come for?  What if Charles had given it to her and she was just in the process of closing the deal – out of danger – free.  Then Sherlock AND her beloved husband show up? 

Where would you put that if you had just been given it? She doesn’t have time to even read it because Sherlock is shot and she rushes to the hospital.  If Sherlock tells – then she is going to have to make a daring escape.  Of course she has the files on her – if she hides them and becomes a fugitive she can’t take a chance that she wouldn’t be able to retrieve them. 

So we see her hand a flash drive – all her secrets (maybe) to John. That was not manipulative – it was in fact a sign of faith.  She handed him all the power.  The smart thing to do would have been to cry-lie and bye – we know she has the resources to disappear with his child – she didn’t.  Why does nobody acknowledge that she put her whole life in John and Sherlock’s hands by not running and by having faith in them not to kill her.  Quite an act of contrition if you look at it without the ‘hate-mary-for-johnlock’ Goggles. 

Did she plan for Sherlock to die? Yes.  Most likely.  'Own John Watson's wife, I own Mycroft.'  If Sherlock is dead, that chain is broken.  CAM may still know about her, but she is useless to him and therefore he might leave her and John alone?  (That asset would be way too volatile to continue to mess with and now of no value reaching his goal.)  That was her protection.  But, Sherlock lived.  She is just improvising as best she can. 

In Mary's mind - she is protecting her child. (That isn't really evil) 

Well then lets hate her because Sherlock Shot Cam for Mary? It is her fault.

In the first place – she didn’t plan this. Sherlock didn’t plan it.  He had a plan that fell apart and he improvised – just like Mary – made a split second decision when all was lost. 

Did Sherlock shoot Cam for Mary?

  A little - but it was not his only motive.

 (Revenge for Lord Smallwood. – Lord Smallwood has been driven to suicide.  Now if Elizabeth is such a close contact that she only has to tell her driver ‘Baker Street’ and he knows where to go – then She and Sherlock are more than bloody strangers.  Sherlock knows her well enough to know her perfume – this is a person he is acquainted with.  She doesn’t use Mycroft as a liaison. She goes to him on a drop in basis – that is quite familiar.  So let’s just assume that he also Knows Lord Smallwood.  Smallwood is now dead and Sherlock has to feel that he failed them.  He is reading the paper and looking infuriated. 

 

 Revenge for something in the past we don't know- remember he hated him before the Mary/Lady Smallwood bit.  He accuses Mycroft of being under his thumb.  There is some kind of horrid history there.  Appalled.  That is a very specific word. 

‘Don’t appall me when I’m high!’ This is the first time we have ever seen Sherlock be physically aggressive with Mycroft.  What had Mycroft done that would appall Sherlock to the point of actually doing Mycroft harm?  We don’t know.  But it has to be pretty nasty. 

In my mind Mycroft and Charles had some sort of thing – love affair – friendship – doesn’t matter but something personal. Now – Mycroft calls average people Goldfish – Cam pops his mouth about lady Smallwood as if she is one of HIS goldfish. (I like her – pop pop – British with a backbone)  Sherlock calls him a Shark – Goldfish to shark is not a difficult leap.  More on that in another chapter too. 

(Something about the deleted hospital scene) Sorry but that has to be factored into this discussion.  It was released even though it didn’t fit into the editing time.  Why is that important?  Because we just got our first blooper real but THAT was given to us right away.  We needed that to understand.

Charles tells Sherlock that he will become accustom to his wet touch. It is more than a bit rapey-molestery – Did Charles intend to force Sherlock to be his rent boy?  Sounds that way – you will become accustom to my touch – I own you.  Sherlock is helpless and where the hell is John?  Charles all but kisses Sherlock. 

  He also says that Sherlock can keep his hands.   (That is really creepy – but it gets even creepier when he kisses Sherlock’s hands)  What would it mean for Sherlock to lose his hands?  He would lose his violin.  His sanity.  That is not a threat to be taken lightly. (I don’t know if I could stand to live if I could never again play my violin – yes it is that important)

Then in the café scene – with the deleted scene in context – Sherlock demands that he be invited to Appledore. (It feels flirty – ‘I have been thinking about you too’ – Ugh – in what way?  While he wanks?  It is hard to see without the deleted scene but if you watch them – Charles picks an olive off Sherlock’s plate and eats it – like a lover!!!  See how this just keeps getting creepier?  Charles isn’t just after Mycroft – He likes forced submission for a lot more than financial business.)

Mycroft and Charles – sitting in a tree….

Do you remember the story Magnussen told whilst splattering the fireplace? It is important – but did you listen?

A nation of sheep. I can do anything I want here.  (Who is he discussing?)  The British government.  Who is the British Government? 

Let’s rephrase that monologue.

You’re all so domesticated (Mycroft is a diplomat) all standing around apologising…keeping your little heads down (Who must always apologise for Sherlock – Who keeps his head down whilst running the country – he IS the British Government) A nation of herbivores. (lambs to be slaughtered) I’ve interests all over the world but everything starts in England (Your brother controls nothing – I do) If it works here I try it in a real country (you and your brother are not even a challenge) The United kingdom, petri dish to the western world.  (I can destroy Mycroft any time I want to) 

I know we see the brothers act like five year olds around each other but deep down – you now know Mycroft is Sherlock’s guide in his head – What would Sherlock do to keep his brother safe? I don’t think there would be any boundaries whatsoever.  I have read fictions in which someone makes an attempt on Mycroft’s life and Sherlock pretty much goes feral – it read as perfectly true and I mean there was gleeful torture involved and it didn’t feel wrong at all.  Sherlock may annoy the fire out of Mycroft but I don’t see him allowing anyone in the world to actually harm him.

 

Sure he did it to protect John too..

 Because Magnussen tried to burn John alive.   No matter what Charles said about people standing by-smoke inhalation is not that easy to control. John could have easily died – horribly – especially once they used petrol to light the fire because the fumes are combustible too and John could have been given a slow lingering death in seconds.

 And the last straw- while humiliating John, he mentioned humiliating Janine as well. Did you see Sherlock’s reaction to the revelation that he had also abused Janine? 

Where is Mary on the list? LOL way down.  Oh she is there because Magussen could have her and the baby and John destroyed with a phone call. 

So put yourself in Sherlock’s place. He won’ kill you, but he will have your hands cut off  If you knew that this man was planning on using you for sex and your life would be submitting to him every second until he finally killed John or his child and on top of that, he would no doubt tape your humiliation and use it against your brother.  What would you do?  I would have wished him a merry Christmas too.  For me alone – all the rest of the reasons were just icing on the bullet.   I’d rather be killed than let him own me.  The fear that any second he could take everyone I love would not allow me to do otherwise.  

Why did he say Mary?

**‘Give Mary my love. Tell her she is safe now.’**

Sherlock expected to be Shot right then and there. He waited until there were witnesses so there was no question that it was not John.

Give Mary my love – because I won’t ever be able to tell her and I mean for you to give her the love I can’t give you now.

Tell her she is safe now – and therefore you are safe and that is all I need to know.

 Poor Mycroft- nearly hysterically (well for Mycroft) screaming ‘Stand fire! Stand fire! – do not fire on Sherlock Holmes!”

Why did he say THAT – for Mary?

 We all know Sherlock loves John in some capacity – doesn’t even have to be Johnlock to work – it is still love even if you are absolutely against even the tiny thought that there is any gay undertones you still have to realise that Sherlock loves John more than he loves himself.  He can’t die here this time letting John think he was just a psychopath after all.

**There are no heroes, John. Heroes don’t exist and if they did, I wouldn’t be one of them.**

**One day, we will all be standing around a body, and Sherlock Holmes will have put it there.**

Sherlock has just proven Sally Donovan right. (Probably not the first time – but this was in front of John)

Sherlock expects to die and those two lines let him be a hero after all. I did this for Mary who you love the most.  I will die because I kept my vow to the three of you.  Please don’t be sad.  This is a soldier’s death to be embraced.

‘No way to be a hero this time, Mr. Holmes’

He can be a hero in one man’s eyes. That is the choice he makes.  He really had nothing to lose if he let Charles carry on.  What life would he have had if Charles had lived.  He took the head-shot that Mary would have taken if she really was just evil and was on a mission to kill Sherlock.

So this is the end of lesson one – Why we can like Mary and still be Okay with Johnlock. I think we should be thanking Amanda Abbington  for pulling off such a great character and giving her lots and lots of love while we still can because she is going to be the first dang major death that will probably stay dead! 

Why?

Think of all the john Watson torture we will obsess over then? Think of How we will cheer Sherlock on as he tries to keep John from jumping off Tower Bridge and I am soooo sorry that we are going to lose that darling little one as well probably. 

I don’t see John and Sherlock doing the parent thing – even if some of the fics about it are adorable.

I have heard it is surmised that we will never see the baby – but I bet that we do. (Think of all the lovely brooding Sherlock miles we would get if he bonds to little she-john and then he loses her – John and Sherlock both broken and out to avenge this awful thing happening would be spectacularly dangerous.  )  

It could happen that John does have to be the one to kill Mary as everyone thinks – hey it is possible. But he would never kill his child – not even for Sherlock – it is a chemical defect of the parent that allows even teenagers to survive being the world’s biggest arseholes most of the time. (child abuse is when those chemicals are absent – as in psychopaths) I grant that John is a very volatile dangerous guy – but I vote **_nope_** that he would never murder his wife and child even for Sherlock. (Wife alone - possible)

  But – the balance of probability is someone kills Mary and takes the baby or kills them both and Mary dies trying to save the baby (hero death thing) and John and Sherlock must save the world whilst falling apart themselves.  Our hint is consequences and dark – so I could see this story arch tearing John and Sherlock apart – because they said it would be much worse than Reichenbach and John and Sherlock hating each other over dead child is about as awful of a thing as I can dream up. 

How do you think Mary will play out?  Do you believe she is a villain?  Is she our missing Sebastian Moran? 

 

 

Next meta will be something along the lines of why Mycroft is awesomeness or why John is not the sweetie you all paint him to be. Good man – yes.  Mr. Cuddles – God no. 

Hope you enjoyed my ramblings... feel free to ramble back.

Here is a link in which I put some of these rambles into practice.    http://archiveofourown.org/works/1316965/chapters/2738056

 

 

* * *

* * *

**Here is part of the rant that inspired me just so you have a reference - no - I won't identify her.  I will simply assume she had a very bad day and thank her anonymously for the fantastic idea.  I hope tomorrow is better for her. <br />**   
**\----------------**

_" I said specifically said that I welcome "commiseration against shitty Mary", but nowhere does it mention that I'm looking for Mary sympathizers to try and sway me otherwise yet you choose to come here and write an essay trying to justify her actions. That's unbelievably rude._

_If you like Mary, go read a Mary-loving fic, there are plenty. Just from the tags alone you should have known this fic wouldn't portray her nicely, which makes me wonder if you even read the fic at all or just dropped down to the bottom to comment and patronize me. If I wanted discussions and debates, I'll go on the many forums and websites for that, but this website is for fanfiction and I'm here to post my fanfiction with my views of the their characterizations, so if you dislike it that little back arrow is just a click away. Write your own bloody fic with Mary being the centre of attention, make her into super woman who swoops in and saves John, Sherlock, Mycroft, Mrs. Hudson and the entire world for all the fucks I give._

_I'm not wasting anymore time on this and if you comment again with anymore Mary-loving crap I will delete. Consider yourself warned."_ <br />  
\--------------<br />  
Just to be clear - it was much shorter than this and it was the first comment I had made and I complimented her story but she didn't read that far.  I didn't ask her to waste any time replying twice to one comment?  I did tell her I thank her for the inspiration - but she deleted that too.  

Thanks again for the perfect idea - though I personally have written Mary as both horrid and heroic - and even one slightly drama queen mary sue before we actually met her.


	2. Dear John – Three continent’s Watson – the scariest man you will ever meet!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kittens, Jam and Rage - well that about sums up Martin Freeman and he brings all that and more to the table as John Watson. This chapter explains why John is not Mr. Cuddles and yes - he is still a Good man but there are some very murky waters in that bundle of Grandad's clothes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for the wonderful comments an I very much hope this doesn't get too nerdy for you.
> 
> Ok - here is my secret stash of Fanfics - I just published this page for you guys because I have had it for 2 years and left it unpublished - So The idea here is for you to recommend fictions you like as well - just find a category you think it fits in and ad it to the comment section -- come join me - https://www.facebook.com/RedButtonHole/?ref=hl

****

Dear John – Three continent’s Watson – the scariest man you will ever meet!

 

\---

****

**_'When a doctor does go wrong, he is the first of criminals.  He has the nerve and he has the knowledge.'_ **

**_-The Adventure of the Speckled Band_ **

 

I love John. He is such a nice man – a cuddly little hobbit and the only human in the world who could genuinely love Sherlock Holmes as much as…WE DO? 

Wow – have we been watching the same character because This John is, for certain, absolutely not Mr. Cuddles!  

Let’s begin by addressing that very first startling flash of his memories of war. WHAT did you see? 

Look at it very carefully. (Doctor in a war zone with rows of wounded he can never catch up with?  Grim field surgeries covered in gore?  Did we never see Mash 4077 – do we not have some idea of what he should have been doing if he were Trapper John?)

What DID you see?

John’s memories or dreams showed a small unit – heavily armed and pinned down on a roof. (Anyone seen ‘Black Hawk Down’  - what were those guys?)  They were not regular soldiers – they were special ops – yes- British and American military structures have many parallels – Her Majesty’s gentlemen are just a bit more closed mouth about it.

So from the first second of this series what does that tell us about John? He was no ordinary Doctor. 

Here is the next thing we know – John has been invalided home. He has a tremor in his hand that precludes him from performing the duties for which he was trained. 

Really? Because Doctors are desperately needed during war and he could have still served for years if he’d wanted to be a GP – yeah trembling handed surgeon could be a bit dicey but they sent him home? 

They sent him home when he had nothing to return to – that meant it was not his choice in any way. They didn’t want him as a GP.  First five minutes of this program, my first thought was – What the hell did John DO that they sent him home?   

We see John cry.

(internal war wounds? PTSD – we have no reference to his emotional inner world – he may just be in touch with his feelings and be one of those men who cry a lot – there isn’t anything wrong with that if you get the John Wayne crap out of your head.)

Then we see John open that drawer and if you don’t believe the man is a walking hiding suicide at that second then let me mention that there is a picture of the original script in which it is noted by the authors that John is suicidal.

Is John a cry baby? When will be the next time we see him shed a tear?  If anything John Watson is an emotional Bomb waiting to go off. 

So let’s put all that together and connect the dots. John was a highly trained elite soldier, small of stature but absolutely deadly and with superior medical knowledge compared to an average medic – he was not working in a field hospital but was instead with a special ops branch that saw actual combat – what can we infer?  Well he may have been part of an extraction unit – sent to rescue those captured and injured (yep written that) or he may have been  deep recon – sent to gather info – or spy on the enemy – those units must be self-contained and a medical doctor is not out of the question depending on the mission.  There are a few similar type scenarios but we have to look at John as a man who intended to be career and his shoulder injury would not have stopped that – not really.

That is the only explanation for him not healing and resuming some kind of Doctorly duties. They sent him home and he was devastated.  He had isolated himself – no friends to speak of and a limp with no physical injury corresponding. 

How is that psychosomatic limp important?

Because it disappears.

Symbolically John had been crippled. But it was not real.  His tremor isn’t real either because it goes away when he is in danger.  Technically – the day after John meets Sherlock he is ‘fit for duty’ and running into his future.

When he met Stamford we see a man so frustrated that he can barely be civil to this sweet ball of kindness. Mike Stamford is overjoyed to see his friend and John is fighting his need to get away and yet keeping up appearances. 

**“Who’d want me for a flatmate?”   “Yeah, I’m not that John Watson.”**

John hates himself. It is far worse than trust issues.  John hates everything and everyone and life is a complete waste of time.  Nobody will ever love him.  He’s broke and broken and it is all in his head so he may not even be capable of practicing medicine.  He has lost everything – his army family, his life work, his place in the world and even his ability to control his own body.  He has lost his place in which he was treated with respect and the glory of doing something that mattered every day.  He is trying.  Bless him, he is trying so hard to submit to all the Crap – trying to give it time to get better like everyone keeps promising – But he honestly has no belief and no hope and he is just biding his time – no more. 

There is a sort of undercurrent out there that John instantly connected with Sherlock. Did he?

In my mind no – he didn’t. He was a little intrigued and it was something to fill the time.  Keep him in London for a little longer.  Sherlock was the first person who saw him.  He was wandering London as the invisible man – just some cripple (In his mind) and Sherlock, the rude bastard, could see him.  A tiny light flicked on for John.  Someone could see him and most importantly…approved of what they saw. 

So John goes home and researches his potential flat mate and realises the man is mad as a box of frogs but probably brilliant and he really has nothing to lose by looking at the flat.

Does he like Sherlock at this point? Hell no.  He knows he’s an arrogant twat and he doesn’t compliment him on the Science of Deduction – instead he challenges him.  Let’s see what you are made of Mr. Genius?

Look how angry he is when Sherlock glides out the door.

 The bloody chair is comfy, I will just sit here but I hate you and everything in my life I even just screamed at an old woman offering me tea – I am a monster and …

“You were a doctor…an army doctor…

Did you see the deep breath Martin took there? That second.  A tiny spark of hope.  (Martin is absolutely one of the most amazing actors of our time – and I will never stop watching anything he’s in) 

What does he do next? Gets left behind – stands up to Mycroft – forgets his cane and…

Shoots an unarmed man.

Tell me. Was John saving Sherlock?  Or was he saving himself? 

What does he do after committing murder? He threw himself into the fire to test the heat. 

This man he just saved is surrounded by police and in fact solves unsolvable crimes for them – how good is he? Will he catch me?  (Now think to yourself – would you – having just committed murder play with those who would arrest you? Or would you head for the hills like a normal murderer?  )

John stands at parade-rest awaiting any fate Sherlock deals. That is a man of the most audacious bollocks in the world. 

We all love that scene because it is hilarious from our perspective.

What was it like from John’s?

It looks a bit like death by cop to me. (In the pilot he says his gun is in the Thames – but that is left out in episode one.)  He is standing there with the bloody murder weapon tucked in his trousers.  Looking innocent and smiling.  Daring Sherlock to ‘out’ him – because honestly – John doesn’t give a damn one way or another. 

Sherlock is slow but he catches on – John is blown away that he can trust this stranger with his life and he’s had a nice evening – one that he would have missed if he had put that bullet in his head rather than in the bad cabbie.

Now we have a bond – Granted it is a bond over murder – but Hope did kill people so it was a righteous kill --- Right?

So that is your Mr. Cuddles.

John is a monster hiding in plain sight.

Don’t take that wrong – he isn’t a monster in the evil bad guy sense. No, he holds himself to his own version of a moral compass – but he is brewing something you don’t want to play with deep down inside.  All his loss and pain and life messes are tucked away locked and weighted down under his shiny Sherlock box.  John is not actually dealing with his issues, he is deflecting them. 

We can see his frustration and it bubbles out in ways we are told to find charming.. Aww John yelled at the chip and pin machine – (what would you honestly think if you met some guy dressed as your Granddad in the front of the queue who made a scene and stormed out of Tesco – leaving you to have to wait for his items to be tidied away?  You would think he was a complete wanker and cost you missing your normal train/bus/boris bike (hehe) – you would hate him.  But it is funny because we all feel a little like John – life is so bloody complicated and annoying.  )

What happens when Sherlock hits John?

There is your Mr. Cuddles. Veins popping seconds from killing his best friend with his bare hands. What does that tell you?  Oh right – John is a soldier.  Partly – it gave him the skills but that rage has bubbled out for us.  

What did he do when Le-Sherlock popped up? He tried to choke him.  Threw him on the ground in an upscale restaurant.

Then what did he do? Oh he jumped across a table to assault him again. 

What happened next? He headbutted him in a kabob shop.

Of course we laughed – it was brilliant. But never forget if they have you laughing – they are also conveying important stuff in a subtle way. 

In the real world with real friends – Sherlock would have pressed charges and probably the eating establishments too. He needs to be bloody sectioned.  He is most boldly a danger to others – one specifically and rightly justified from his perspective, but he is a time bomb. 

But pay attention to that because when Mary does die – I do see his ability to control it bleed out. He may go very dark – Push Sherlock away or take it out on him and once again we are back to the worst thing I can see is He and Sherlock both put in some self-loathing limbo that actuates against each other.  (Of course we know it won’t really be the end for them – they pal around for years but John is going to have to grow (not grow up just a form of character development) and there will be growing pains.

Back to how he smiles when he’s dangerous…

I know that rage. I may be old and female but trauma and fight or flight can get us pretty screwed up when we suppress stuff.   I have boxes and boxes.  My best friend actually is a diagnosed sociopath and I know some of his boxes.  He and I have to be very careful because once it starts to pour out – that rage can be mighty hard to let go. 

What is a sociopath? Well first of all it is an old term and no longer used – but I will use it because it is tossed around all the time on this show.  --They have a very hard time bonding with people. (I know some say they can’t love or bond at all, but it simply isn’t true – they can – and if you ever have one actually bond to you – God help you, but you have a friend for life) They can fake it when they choose to – can be quite charming in fact but it requires effort and can’t be sustained.  They have suppressed their emotions and it probably started out as a way to protect themselves, but one day it jumped the fence and they can’t find a way to undo it.  They don’t play by the rules but often pretend to – they have their own rules and their own morals.  When there is something in the world that grounds them – you may never notice them.    There is a ton more to this and I don’t want to simplify it too much but at the same time that could take up volumes all by itself. 

Sherlock says he is a high functioning sociopath – the only one in the world because that is meaningless – LOL.

John is much closer to it than Sherlock.

John is the scariest character on this show – if he lost his reality (things that keep him grounded – and he turned it all outward rather than inward (self -destructive)He would be Dexter. I am not kidding.

Side note – Most people when faced with a physical confrontation – when they face betrayal – when they face death even – their faces show pain, terror, fear, hurt.   Some people start to buzz and tingle and they smile.  Don’t fight those of us who smile – walk away.  We have been in battle and our lizard brains are stepping up to rule when you see that smile. 

(This is why Martin Freeman is a God! John Watson either squints his eyes if there is nothing to fight(Bomb in the train and gun to his head in Chinese theatre) or he smiles if there is any chance he can win. When he’d just met Mary the Sherlock Shooter – look at his smile.  In a fight – you will never beat someone who likes it -because they know how to focus on nothing but one singular thing – survival at all costs.  Mary goes blank to gain her focus – But John challenged her to raise her weapon to him again – with that look)

They gave us a little taste when he breaks into the Smackhead’s lair - What does he do with no supervision?  He smiles – he walks up to the knife just to give the poor guy a chance –

‘Go – or I’ll cut ya’”

“Oh. Not from there you won’t. Here let me help you. Now concentrate…”

John is a sexy beast – don’t ever be fooled by Grandads clothes.

Three Continents Watson.

 Now I know that some of us here are actual Sherlockians.  We all get that reference.  We know that it is ACD – Just like the riding crop and cocaine and Mary and the whispers of sodomite undertones and a million other things that our charming heros have said and done already – This story is very much Canon with twists. 

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle was a fascinating man. Do look him up because his actual life will blow you away.  So we have to look at canon and the man who wrote it to really understand the depth of our own John Watson. 

Some people have stated that the three-continents persona is fandom based – It isn’t.

In ‘The Sign of Four’ Watson was described as – ‘having an experience of women which extends over many nations and three separate continents. “     That was pretty wild boasting for that time.  Sexual relations out of wedlock occurred without doubt, but it was not something one would admit to – So Our John with his string of girlfriends is not a funny little side note – it is canon. 

What else does this say about him?

Well he is not able to maintain long term relationships – with two exceptions. Sherlock and Mary – also both somewhat damaged people. But both very interesting and both very dangerous.  In other words, he deludes himself  thinking that he wants a proper wife and a proper home but he can’t actually stand it. 

Mary says – ‘You did see that, and you married me.”

On the surface that seems condescending and a bit like an abuser blaming her victim – but is it? Let’s look at it.   Mary doesn’t say it in a cruel way – It is almost gentle and it affects her.  Her voice gets raspy.  “And you married me.” 

We don’t know what he saw but we must surmise she had some basis for that statement. She is in deep trouble and may lose her husband in the next few moments – I can’t abide that she would just pull that out of her hat to antagonize him.  She had to be reminding him of something we don’t know about – now it is easy to figure out that she lied about WHY she let her mask drop and he saw her as a bit dangerous and liked it – some story that let the big truth slide – but I won’t believe that Mary is blaming him because she is just a psychopath. 

Did you catch the ‘You two should have gotten married’ remark?

Sherlock nearly growls at him.

John said it intending to hurt Sherlock. John knows, at the very least that Sherlock has some sort of jealousy issues.  (I think John knows Sherlock cares for him but because of things like Janine and the Human Error comment,  he refuses to acknowledge that it is real – he honestly is just lashing out in misery.) 

I have seen a theory that John is a little afraid that Sherlock has fallen in love with Mary – and they are chatting behind John’s back –“Mary and I think seven.” And Mary is the first word he says after being dead for a few minutes and Now he’s taking up for her so I can see Mr. Trustissues being snarky. 

Many people take another line as Sherlock blaming John.

“Because you chose her.” Then he looked to his right.   (He was hiding something – is it so hard to grasp the rest of the line was – AND NOT ME ----- all the rest of it was to cover up what John almost saw – That is why John is so angry. 

I made the wrong choice and …. “Why is it always, my bloody fault.” Kick a chair.

We saw Sherlock do the same exact thing on the Tarmac.

“ For how long?”

“Six months my brother estimates…he’s never wrong.”

“Then what?” John askes.

Sherlocks eyes widen realising John doesn’t have a clue – he looks to the right – hiding that he will be dead!

“Who knows?” The last great adventure? 

 Sherlock on death… 

**“Education never ends, Watson. It is a series of lessons, with the greatest for the last.”**

**His Last Bow – The Red Circle**

So to me – this was some reference to the last great Mystery For Sherlock to solve – It was not a lie – but he was obviously hiding the full truth. I think Cumberbatch plays that as a tell when Sherlock lies to John. 

 

John is a selfish man only once in canon.

**“The good Watson had at that time deserted me for a wife, the only selfish action which I can recall in our association. I was alone. “Sherlock Holmes Writing -The Blanched Soldier**

Deep down he is not as wholesome as we want to believe.

There is a basis for that -- what is known as the Sherlock Holmes apocrypha. (Sorry my nerd is showing here)  There are other stories you see.  Unpublished stories.  (some are published ,obviously, now)

Arthur Conan Doyle hated Sherlock Holmes. He wrote lots of really marvelous stories nobody reads whilst this little detective story – not even a completely original idea - sort of took over all his literary endeavours.   

So there is a story, a play in three acts called ‘Angels of Darkness’ in which John marries a woman named Constance in San Francisco whilst betrothed to a woman named Lucy. It has been deemed the Watson of Darkness and so a Darker – less perfect John was envisioned by Doyle at some point. 

 

So it sounds like so far I am saying that John is a Bad man –(well he says it too – “You are a very bad man” when Sherlock sends him a picture of Dr. Mortimer)

No. John is not a bad person.   I have to quote one of my commenters here because the way she described him is just too lovely to paraphrase and I really can’t do it better.  Thank you **Vera** for your charming description. 

 

 

* * *

 

and I also acknowledge that John is very dangerous...maybe the most dangerous personality in the serial - it´s what he is - a mix of bravery, humor, real danger, but also with surfaced despair, hardness, mistrust - but always with ever resilient goodness and kindness (I sense abused child in him - it´s why I find Sherlock´s argumentation in HLW so distressing).

* * *

 

Not bad at all on that one ----- because some history of alcohol abuse in the family is Canon.  When the original John returns – his brother had followed in his father’s footsteps and John has no living relative.  His father is said to have been able to afford a 50 guinea watch but had pawned it four times and had not cared for it properly because of his abuse of alcohol.   (Study in pink – our Phone deduction)

 

John Watson is a man who strives to be a truly good man. That does not mean he is perfect or cuddly – lol. 

He has not lived a soft life.  

But some part of him does desire the romantic allure of one. That is one of his many inner battles.  He wants that and he can’t admit that he really isn’t suited for it. 

What do we learn about John in the abominable bride?

How about he can love someone enough to play the fool while being so pissed off with them he can barely speak.

So that gives us some reference that despite Mary trying to make dead Sherlocks for us that he will make some sort of honest effort to save his marriage – if nothing else because of his daughter.

I mention this because… There are some really good fics out there who make a grand case that his little speech to Mary is not sincere.

“The problems of your future are my privilege. “

I make a case that for Johnlock to fly – She has to not be Sebastian Moran. If we cheer on her death – then it sets no barrier – no challenge for them to ever be together. 

Simply from a character arch standpoint there must be absolutely no hope for the characters to have their happy ending. Mary may not come between them but her death may come close to breaking them in some way. 

If she is pure evil and they come together against her – it does not set up that hopeless arch.

If one of them chooses Mary and she IS evil – then we have the hopeless but it could be the one thing that would break their loyalty.

Possibility one – John has to choose between evil Mary and Sherlock – He picks Mary – Sherlock would never recover. He picks Sherlock – Sherlock would lose respect for him because he abandoned his child.

Possibility two – Sherlock picks Evil Mary – John would simply be done. Sherlock picks John – Evil Mary will kill them both or they have to kill her – survivability of that is dubious especially if child is caught in the crossfire.  

The romance is tainted for all time in any of those scenarios.

 

 

Sherlock Mary and John stay a team and adore each other but the unthinkable happens – eventually Sherlock and John would forgive themselves and bond over the mutual loss/the glory of revenge/a new lease on life because Johnlock happens. Sherlock can be there for as long as it takes to FIX John.   John can torture him with rejection – denial anything in the world but it is still the two of them against the rest of the world.  

 

 

===Side note here – I absolutely adore Johnlock – I hope it is in the works and just as grand as all the maybes and metas and hope mongers hope. I do think it is in the works but it honestly has less to do with all the flowers and birds at the wedding and the lighting subtext and all of that.  Here is my nerdy little heart flaring again.

 What happened in 1895 that has That Year all over this series?  

  There was a trial in which a fellow author had been accused (and rightly so – he was painfully guilty) of gross indecency.

 Oscar Wilde was not just some guy.  He and ACD had a very famous lunch together with their literary agent.  This is the lunch of legends in which Wilde signed for A picture of Dorian Grey and ACD agreed to write a Sherlock Holmes book.  This meeting made literary history.  Two books signed at the same table that would survive and still be with us and popular today.

 A few short years later – Wilde would die – his health broken from his time in prison for the crime of loving a man. 

<http://law2.umkc.edu/faculty/projects/ftrials/wilde/wilde.htm>

 

ACD alluded to this travesty because as the trials of his friend continued – men of a certain persuasion found accommodation in London too fearful. Doyle was disgusted with the whole affair.  Remember he was a rather open minded man and a free thinker – but he could not publicly support Wilde without coming under suspicion himself.  It is a bit oblique – but Sherlock and John leave London and take rooms in a University town. 

 

**_“IT was in the year ‘95 that a combination of events, into which I need not enter, caused Mr. Sherlock Holmes and myself to spend some weeks in one of our great University towns, and it was during this time that the small but instructive adventure which I am about to relate befell us.” The Adventure of the Three Students._ **

**_http://etc.usf.edu/lit2go/178/the-return-of-sherlock-holmes/3235/chapter-ix-the-adventure-of-the-three-students/_ **

****

Did Sherlock and John have to leave town to avoid scandal?

I do believe it was ACD’s one little comment upon the whole nightmare. People blackmailed others to the point the law was called Blackmailers Charter.

_"Blackmailers' Charter", for very many – perhaps even most – blackmail attempts involved a threat to expose a man as a homosexual, whether or not he were in fact gay. This was equally true in the early eighteenth century.”_

Read more here -   <http://www.rictornorton.co.uk/eighteen/blackmai.htm>

There is one more comment - - the father of ‘Bosie’ is the one who brought charges against Wilde.  Pay attention to his name.

 The father of Alfred Douglas,

 John Sholto Douglas, the Marquess of Queensberry.  (Yep he was the one who promoted the rules for boxing) 

Sholto – was a very not nice man in canon and John’s commander in the BBC version.

So – this is why I honestly would like to see Johnlock – but it is not necessary because it is already there.

 

I will be happy no matter if there is a hotty Snog or not – because you don’t have to have sex with someone on camera for it to still be completely true and you don’

don’t have to have sex with them at all to be in love with them.   I am still in love with my first boyfriend, Jack.  We never had sex – wanted to wait and he died in a terrible accident.  The act alone does not make it true. 

It is already a love story – no debate there.

What kind? It really doesn’t matter. 

 

What is the important part?

 

John is going to know horrible tragedy and the only one in the world who can fix him is going to be Sherlock.

Okay – nerd world over – Back to John.

 

We saw drunk Sherlock telling us he had an international reputation for ---something or other.

Did John have an international reputation?   He sure does.  He has a reputation for bedding –errr women?

Neither Sherlock nor Mary were his first> His first what?

Now let us just think on the dog not barking again?   John tells us he isn’t gay.  That does not mean he is Straight – it isn’t an either or question.   Not gay – not straight – somewhere in the middle -   would that not allude to the unspoken three continents? 

 

So we have a John who is a bit of a time bomb – we expect him to see more tragedy and on top of that he has some real issues with how he feels for Sherlock.  

BOOM.  

He is brave. He is kind. He is loyal. And we may see some bits in which he is not a very cuddly man – I personally love him BECAUSE he is not your typical hero.  I like him broken and complex and a bit of a wild card as far as his dangerous side. 

Because that is the fact that we all believe in – even the johnlock haters – These two men are better together than they will ever be apart and that is the truth. Sherlock soothes the John-beast as much as John gives Sherlock humanity. 

It doesn’t have to be the meeting of genitals – look at the writers – one is gay one is straight and they adore each other – I could live with it just being that – friendship. It is fine. 

I still would very much LIKE Johnlock.

I would love to see affection murder all their demons once and for all, because these two in my mind have waited so long and it is time the love story gets its happy ending.  If not this Sherlock – then another surely will. 

**"Circumstantial evidence is a very tricky thing," answered Holmes thoughtfully. "It may seem to point very straight to one thing, but if you shift your own point of view a little, you may find it pointing in an equally uncompromising manner to something entirely different.” The Boscombe Valley Mystery**

**Ok the floor is open for the fun of discussion…..**

**Next topic will probably be about the incredibly sexy British Government because Mycroft is my favorite and they better not kill him.**

**Thank you all for the wonderful comments so far!**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok - here is my secret stash of Fanfics - I just published this page for you guys because I have had it for 2 years and left it unpublished - So The idea here is for you to recommend fictions you like as well - just find a category you think it fits in and ad it to the comment section -- come join me - https://www.facebook.com/RedButtonHole/?ref=hl


	3. For the love of umbrellas, I think Mycroft is the king.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This got away from me a little but it makes some points in the world revolving around Mycroft - I also popped a couple of shorty fics to make a point and to make you giggle - let me know if it worked because I rarely do such short things. If I make you look at Mycroft in a new way - please do let me know. Even if you still hate him - it is fine - but do comment.

**For the love of umbrellas, I think Mycroft is the king.**

**http://captainmartinducreff.tumblr.com/post/18741524375/10-day-sherlock-challenge-day-10-whatever**

**Welcome back…**

If I could be anyone on this show – it would be Mycroft.

If I could date anyone on this show – it would be Mycroft.

If you have never seen Mark Gatiss in drag (or naked on Dr. Who) You honestly don’t know that he has the prettiest legs on planet earth. (I am normally not a leg person – but they really are that striking.)

So, with that preface – I am here to extoll the virtues and villainy of the British Government.

 

I know what you are about to say…

Ugh – he’s boring – mean to Sherlock – creepy – nasty – sold his brother – spies on him – kidnaps John – a snob – rubbish big brother – has a stick up his…umbrella?

I have to admit – I only watched this show to see Sherlock’s coat. (If you know me you know that antique umbrellas and greatcoats are two of my obsessions – most of you don’t know me so there you are)  I am also a bit of a Sherlockian so frankly I hate most of the Sherlock personas.  I edited a fan fiction and got sucked in by the precise description of ‘The Coat’ and the romance between John and Sherlock.  (I asked where she’d found these books – was horrified I had started writing my own fiction about a telly show  and I had never seen the bloody thing– had I really sunk so low? )

This is the bit that sucked me in.

_There was not coat in all of London that looked exactly like his. That flamboyant, bespoke monstrosity of the infinite pockets and the double breasted, high-peak lapel cut, that could only look good on someone as poncy as his dead detective, made John’s heart stutter. He knew the softness of that expensive Donegal wool against his cheek.  It was the only one in the world._

_John dropped his shopping and began to run.  It was Sherlock.  It had to be.  He had come back to him. Even death could not keep Sherlock away.  Even if he were a ghost, John would follow. He always followed._

_The reverse dog-tooth, gun-powder flecked, charcoal tweed, caught a slight breeze and billowed dramatically.  Swirling like a hero’s cape from the ridiculous old-fashioned box-pleat swing-skirt, Sherlock disappeared around the corner into a dead-end mews. What was left of that bloody coat and the blue scarf, were supposed to be in police custody.   John stood in the entry of the litter strewn cobble-lined street, breathing hard and shaking with need._

_There was nobody there and no exit._

I can’t find her fics any longer – I think she moved on to better things – this was written before Reichenbach and Sherlock had died at the pool. So – I ordered the first season basically for the coat-porn.  Wasn’t that the most delicious description of the Belstaff you have ever read?  (Of course that was long before we knew it was a Belstaff Milford – much less off-the-peg)

I do have a ‘Sherlock Coat’ now. An exact stitch for stitch, button for button, reproduction made from the last run of the supplier Belstaff used.  It IS delicious and worth the expense.  I don’t cos-play or whatever – for me it is coat 37 and not even my only box-pleat vent (have three of those now – lol) 

So – that was how I found this series. Then, a very sinister man stepped into the frame in a damp abandoned warehouse and…

“When one is avoiding the attention of Sherlock Holmes, one learns to be discreet, hence this place.”

Now at this point we had no idea that he was not some evil villain but any Sherlockian would suspect we were meeting Mycroft – and he was being played by Mark Bloody Gatiss!   (The hint was the cameras because – you know – government stuff) 

I am now – at this second – IN Love with this little BBC version – so much canon in a whole new way and one of the funniest men on the planet as my favorite character – and Mr. Finkel - and that guy off the boat movie – Umbrellas and coats – Okay I am hooked. 

Then everyone hated Mycroft and I adored him so much – You will never find an evil or dead Mycroft in one of my fics – Oh I don’t think he’s a saint – But Mycroft is most definably a very dark-murky hero.

 

Mycroft is a bit scary. After all if Sherlock Holmes says he is the most dangerous man you have ever met – we should probably believe him? 

(Notice John isn’t even the slightest bit afraid of him? Sort of backs up my belief that John is even scarier?) 

Are we supposed to hate Mycroft?

I am truly not sure, because we only see glimpses of him.

I have read some M-Theory metas and some of them make perfect sense. I don’t think he was the M on General Shan’s computer like they do. 

  I don’t think anyone who has arisen to such power at such a young age could possibly have perfectly clean hands but I do believe that what we see from Sherlock and John’s perspective shows that he wields his considerable power with rather high moral standards for the most part and seeks to impose the ‘Greater Good’ in the long game. 

I think the exception is Sherlock.

Does he care about Sherlock? Does Sherlock hate him?

One of the first things he tells us is that he worries about his brother constantly. He never tells John – stay away or I will make you disappear he asked for his help in the most snooty-over the top, obnoxious way possible – doesn’t make it plain that he is even related to the man then tries to put John in his place several times and is thwarted at every turn.

Mycroft can’t figure John out and get in his head the way he does with the normal goldfish and he is a bit baffled with how to play this little army doctor to gain the information he requires. He threatens, shames, offers him money, shows off his superior intellect and his significant power, tries flattery and this little nobody just takes it and seems to be transformed into something he can’t quite fathom before Mycroft’s very eyes.  He approves. 

He’s obviously already vetted John Watson, so he knows the man is no actual danger to Sherlock, but the fact that HE of all people seems to be losing his massively manipulative touch – practically horrifies him.

Guess what – Mycroft likes John. John impresses the hell out of him.  So he withdraws  and tells him a very oblique warning. 

‘Welcome back. Time to choose a side, Doctor Watson.’ 

What does that even mean? Time to choose a side?

It was too early in the show to understand that line but think how often John has had to make decisions since to pick Sherlock – be there for Sherlock – protect Sherlock. Mycroft was sort of warning him that choosing the side of his brother was a difficult path but if he did make that choice, his show of absolute loyalty would be his only option.

 It was the Mycroft version of the big brother – ‘hurt my sibling and I will do horrible unspeakable things to your corpse’ speech. 

John isn’t so creeped out by this weird kidnapping thing that he fails to hit on the kidnappers apprentice. (Again I stress that John is a bad arse) 

Has anyone ever considered that if Mycroft had disapproved of John Watson – demanded he stay away from Sherlock or just decided to keep him occupied with questions - what the result of that would have been?  Or if john had just had a normal sort of reaction and simply wanted NOTHING more to do with this rude person who abandoned him and then he got shoved in some mad man’s Goldfinger-mobile – most people would be done right there – { ** _Man- I don’t know what kind of mob boss trouble this bloke is in, but between dead bodies and makers of dead bodies I am going home and going to bed and he can keep that damn flat full of rubbish }_**

Sherlock would have died that night.

(Yes he took the wrong bloody pill – yes I can prove it – several of my fics say something about that – go read them)

If Mycroft had been slightly more over protective or John had been slightly terrified – Sherlock would have still found the cabbie – taken the wrong pill and John would have read the next morning that his potential new flat mate had been killed by the same serial killer they had been chasing.

I wonder what he would have said on his blog then?

So who would be the only person to put all that together?

Mycroft. He was so worried that he showed up at the crime scene after hearing that there had been a shooting and Sherlock was involved.  He was on his way before he knew the entire story – probably intercepted police dispatch and was terrified his brother had just been murdered or Done murder – second guessing himself about letting that ghastly little man leave – speeding through the streets petrified and having to change traffic patterns to let him get there faster.  I can see him breathing hard as Anthea updates him – moment by moment.  Two minutes before they arrive – he is finally assured that Sherlock is alive and un-injured and it was the cabbie/killer who was the fatality.  He exits the car and says something snarky and horrible –

“So, another case cracked. How very public spirited ... though that’s never really your motivation, is it?”

But is He really the awful one?

“He is the British government, when he’s not too busy being the British Secret Service or the CIA on a freelance basis. Good evening, Mycroft. Try not to start a war before I get home. You know what it does for the traffic.”

Sherlock is just nasty and walks away – never for a second suspecting or acknowledging that he’s probably come close to giving his brother a myocardial infarction!

 

 

 

* * *

 

____***

I Found this transcript this evening as I was trying to double check if it were FBI or CIA that was the freelance basis. I have to share this with you and then link you to her as my acknowledgement - I am quite impressed with her exactness.  Hehehe

 MYCROFT: Interesting, that soldier fellow.

(Not-Anthea looks briefly at the departing boys, then turns her attention back to her BlackBerry.)

MYCROFT: He could be the making of my brother – or make him worse than ever. Either way, we’d better upgrade their surveillance status. Grade Three Active.

(Not-Anthea looks up from her phone.)

NOT-ANTHEA: Sorry, sir. Whose status?

(Mycroft intensely watches the departing men.)

MYCROFT: Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson.

(Hero!shot as our boys walk in slow motion towards the camera before turning and smiling at each other as they mentally plan where and how many times they’re going to roger each other senseless once they get home.

*blinks innocently* What? My transcript – my interpretation. If you don’t like it, write your own!

!!!!!!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

http://arianedevere.livejournal.com/42853.html

\-----------------------I LIKE HER – POP-POP –LOL

* * *

 

 

 (BY the way – did you notice how suddenly CLEAN the flat was by the time of the drugs bust – Sherlock was reclined on the couch because he was bloody exhausted!!  He’d put everything away – not necessarily in their proper place – eyeballs in the microwave – probably got Mrs. Hudson to help – Can’t you hear him begging?

* * *

* * *

 

Fanfic crack short – Eyeballs in the microwave – by Howlynn

 

****

“No. I am not your housekeeper! I told you from the start that I’ve got a hip now and just can’t…”

“Please, Mrs. Hudson, he won’t move in if it isn’t tidy. Army Doctors are the most hygienically obsessed people on the planet.” Sherlock looks around exasperated. “Where is he anyway?  Hope he isn’t still looking for the pink suitcase.”

“Oh Sherlock, how would I know? I am very sorry but, you know …I just can’t…”

 “There isn’t a moment to lose.  He could show up any minute!”  Sherlock rushes around shifting boxes and generally making a larger mess. 

“I spent all one day cleaning for you, young man, and look what you did in a few hours!” Mrs. Hudson folds her arms stubbornly.

“But that was Mycroft. His people just dumped my things everywhere.  Should have hired a proper removal company.  MI5 minions are rubbish at it,” Sherlock growls with disgust.

He looks around again as if he’s about to have a meltdown then suddenly turns on the charm and smiles with his best puppy-eyes at his landlady. “Please help me, Mrs. Hudson. I want him to be my flat-mate.  No one’s ever actually liked me before …except you.  He’s brilliant.  Having a Doctor just upstairs would be lovely, wouldn’t it?”

“You stop with your batting the eyelashes. I see right through you.” She shakes her head no, but her eyes soften. 

Sherlock looks properly chastised and becomes the picture of defeated hopelessness as he murmurs, “You’re right. It would probably do no good anyway. I would be a fool to hope.”  He sniffs and drops his head as if his world is ending. 

She sighs in pity and says with resolve, “Oh Sherlock. Of course he likes you.  If he has half the brain you think he does, of course he would.” 

Sherlock moves in for the kill. “ I did get you those extraordinary herbal soothers for your poor hip. They are helping?  I will get you some morphine if you just do this – actually might be a good idea to keep some in your kitchen.  You know how I tend to get stabbed and fall off buildings from time to time.  They’ll never find it in your cupboard.”

Mrs. Hudson shakes her head but begins picking up and directing Sherlock to shift some of the boxes to his bedroom for the moment. “I can help a little but you have to do the lifting.”  She heads into the kitchen and turns on the taps to do the dishes.  She bends slightly, looking at a jar in confusion.  “Sherlock? What are these round things in the jar on the counter?”

“My dinner –erm..Olive soup…here, just let me…” Sherlock rushes into the kitchen and snatches the jar of human eyes he’d forgotten.  He looks around confused as to where he could reasonably tuck them away quickly.  He opens the microwave deposits the eyes and slams the door quickly.  “There.  All ready for me to heat up later.  Once we are done making the place presentable for my…”

“Friend, Sherlock. You’ve got a friend,” She says with obvious pride. 

Sherlock stops for a moment, “Yes. Yes, of course I do.  My friend, John.” 

* * *

* * *

 

 

 

Sorry – back to Big brother.

The first real sympathy we may glimpse for Mycroft shows him home alone on Christmas eve. We don’t question why Mycroft would hate Christmas do we?  No we just assume that he is an arsehole and can’t be bothered to acknowledge his family in any way.  _I hate Christmas too – Mycroft and I will live happily ever after_.

(I am probably wrong and this is just a guess but now that we know that the boys do have living, seemingly darling parents – doesn’t it make you wonder why none of them want to celebrate? I mean it is only one day of the year – I usually put up with it for my Family if invited.  With Mycroft’s comment about the “OTHER ONE” doesn’t it make that seem a bit pointed?  What if the very reason they don’t celebrate is because they lost their brother (In whatever capacity) at Christmas?  If that were true, Mycroft drinking alone on Christmas would certainly make sense.) 

If Mycroft is such a horrible big brother – Why does HE accompany Sherlock to the morgue to identify Adler? Surely, his only interest is the fact it is confirmed.  He drops his day off to scuttle around with his little brother,  and offer him comfort. (low tar and manipulative to test if he might use again... but still - comfort)

“All lives end. All hearts are broken.  Caring is not an advantage, Sherlock”   

 _That is my favorite line from the show._ If there is some Christmas  ‘bad thing’ that they are ignoring, it makes the whole thing far more devastating.  (Mycroft is not telling Sherlock not to care – he is explaining that if you care – you will get hurt.  It is the only end that can be achieved – they will die or disappoint you or both so you must protect your heart)  If they are both reminded of some past tragedy by this time of year then He is trying to give Sherlock some measure of support.  

He calls John and demands that he break his plans to look after Sherlock. He wants to know that the Woman’s death won’t tip him over the edge.  Obviously John and Mycroft have made some sort of mutually acceptable arrangement at this point. 

Morally, John is not obliged to keep Sherlock’s activities secret if John gets to denote what information is important enough to convey. I get the feeling that John and Mycroft have become slightly more than acquaintances and slightly less than friends at this point.  They have bonded over wanting good things for Sherlock – wanting his success. 

John is so used to Mycroft’s cloak and dagger by now that he doesn’t even resent it – he’s sounding off before he even realises that this is The Woman

 

– How could he not tell Kate apart from not- Anthea?

 

John – you nutter – don’t get a leg over and forget them instantly??

And you make fun of Sherlock for deleting important stuff? 

Serves you bloody right getting kidnapped!  Oh that’s right – even when you DO get a leg over – you can’t keep them straight – Jeannette probably had a cat – you should have offered to walk that instead – John is not cuddly. 

Is Mycroft a baddie?

Let’s go to blind banker for a second.   The general  is talking to M – we assume that is Moriarty.  May be but She was not killed by a sniper – no windows.  Had to be someone IN her house – Or was it HER house?  It could be that there was some government wet work going on.  Who has dark paneling? ?  (Diogenes ?  Mycroft’s home?) Was she being forced to talk to the person who set up her Visa – Naming Sherlock Holmes as the cause of her trouble?

She tried to kill his brother. ( not personal – she didn’t even get the right guy!!)

I think Mycroft shot her! Not a Minion – I think He was in the room forcing her to let him trace where Moriarty was and then he shot her to shut her up.  People might want to notice that Mycroft is a tiny bit obsessed with protecting his baby Brother. 

Doesn’t that make him a bad guy?

Really? Awwww – the government is all rainbows and ice lollys!  Pat – pat – go on poppet – hehehe.

The only time I feared that Mycroft was a bad guy was when Sherlock Got on the Bond Aeroplane – he’d been sent a ticket – picked up by his brothers minions and escorted on the plane by the man he threw out the window – That was a huge Oh NO – moment - I thought Mycroft was going to lock him on the plane full of dead people and let it fly off – I really thought he was that angry at Sherlock.

So who is Mycroft? 

To speak of him as a plot device – He is the Wizard. The magic fixer. The voice of logic.  The omnipotent God watching over the goodly land.

If you want to OZ this up a bit –

The cowardly lion – John. (hey he’s not coward!!  Well except about feelings – dealing with his issues – Oh and Ghosts when filtered through Sherlock’s mind palace – but a cowardly lion, my dears, is still a lion.)  John is not a tame lion – to quote Narnia

The Tin man – not just a man without a heart – that is how he’s always viewed – THE tin man was a man who was SEEKING his heart – and that distinction is very important. Sherlock wants to have no heart but the second he takes Watson (the lion hearted – lol – Wait wrong Richard – hehe)  in – we see that façade crumbling. 

The scarecrow – who has no brain but has a folksy wisdom is of course Lestrade. (he proved that in the gag reel with his fall.  I just wonder sometimes – Scarecrow was torn apart and put back together by his friends – something to think about at least. 

So here we have the trinity of main Characters. (You can do this with lots of books – there are certain plot archs that are endlessly repeated – I am just doing it with one we are pretty familiar with and quite frankly somewhere I read ABOUT a meta that explores this idea ad nauseam.   I have never found it but there was an article that talked about it.   I have no idea if my analysis matches theirs but... This works with Harry Potter - Narnia - Lord of the rings - Jungle book - it is simply a way to make you look at the character dynamics, so mine doesn't have to match any others and theirs doesn't have to agree with mine.   

Emerald City – played by beautiful shining London of course.  

Munchkins – Baker Street irregulars of course who were originally children run away from abuse/work houses/ orphanages or just thrown onto the street – the reality of that time for unwanted children was simply staggering.

Glenda the Good witch – Oh lovely Mrs. Hudson in my mind – of course we find out later that Glenda was not all she appeared to be so we can slide Mary into that slot as well on the surface. But for now – lets just go with Hudders.  (Have you You-tubed her yet? )

Then who is Dorothy? – She is the clients who set them off on the golden path of puzzles – the damsels in Distress - The innocent Seeking the truth.   

The wicked witch of the west? Could be Irene – because she loses all for LOVE – Sherlocked. 

Where does Molly fit in?  Oh she does. She is the little dog - beloved and easily unnoticed but central to the plot.   

Then who is Mary? – The wicked Witch of the East – the owner of ruby slippers and the promise of home……..Upon whom an Empty House will fall?

And finally – The wonderful Wizard.

Mycroft – the man behind the curtain? A bumbling illusion?  A man trapped in a nightmare of his own making?  The voice of power?  A man alone in his great hall who has the image of an inflated head of the city – the great mind – or just a terrifying doppelgänger? 

 _I nearly Fell_ _over when Mycroft called Sherlock a Dragon Slayer – because before all the hobbit jokes I had Associated Mycroft with both Gandalf and Dumbledore as his character position.  (Who knew Gandalf would go on to play yet another version of Holmes – God , he was spectacular at it wasn’t he?  GO SEE – Mr. Holmes!)_

What is Mycroft’s function? Is he a villain? 

Oh YES – never doubt for a second that he CAN BE.   I imagine there is no man who can be more ruthless when given the proper circumstance. 

What sort of circumstance?

Deaded Brothers come to mind.

Sherlock has just killed Charles – what do we see?

Those agents should have shot Sherlock. Mycroft frantically commanding them to ‘Stand Fire’

The look of shock on Mycroft’s face. “Oh, Sherlock.  What have you done!” 

What is going on in his head there do you think? _Don’t die. Don’t kill my baby brother. How am I going to save you this time?_

Mark Gatiss conveyed all of that just with his face – (Almost a Martin Freeman moment of facial expressing - conveying three emotions at once) 

I REALLY wish they would have shown more! I mean – How much trouble were our boys in?

 Mummy WAS going to be absolutely monstrous  - She had been drugged.  Did poor Billy Wiggins survive her wrath?  We honestly don’t even know that for certain – hehehe. 

Mary had just gotten lovely words from her husband and then she wakes up to find him in custody ,ON Christmas, at the very least – in… who knows where… with the parents of a murderer and the British Government and an amateur Chemist! Dinner is probably burnt – Billy has riffled through the gifts and the meds cabinet and has probably eaten the pudding – I don’t see Mary being a particular bundle of Joy!

Mycroft has got to be livid.

All I can say is ---- Poor Father Holmes.

“You can imagine the Christmas dinners…” Well we can NOW!  (‘I’ll be home for Christmas’ must be strictly banned in the Holmes household with perfectly good reason!) 

What happened when John finally showed up to collect his wife? Don’t know – I imagine he’s lucky his ears are still attached.  Maybe Sherlock was just giving John a message that would placate her enough that she didn’t drag him all the way back to London by his ear.

‘Your loss would break my heart.”

“All hearts are broken.”

“Don’t get involved.”

Caring may not be an advantage – but You cannot imagine that the Ice Man doesn’t care for Sherlock. 

Are they snarky and snide and sarcastic to each other? Sure they are. 

That is a way some people show affection. Don’t you have some family member who has some sarcastic remark for every situation?  (I loved my grandfather more than anyone in the world – whoever said the most sarcastic thing won – we were at it constantly – drove everyone mad.  He and I were rarely actually angry – we were having fun.  Other people were not – mostly because they couldn’t keep up. )

My son and I had this conversation through his father last night----

HUSBAND - We are at the ER. It is my second home now.

ME – For whom _? (Worried my son is injured or even the Husband.)_

HUSBAND – Lori, _(his married to someone else -home wrecker)_ is having chest pains and shortness of breath.

ME – Oh, So she’s been dealing with Grey, has she?

HUSBAND – {Laughs ruthlessly} It wasn’t his fault.

ME – Funny he does the exact same thing to me although I would never go to hospital unless I were bleeding out and could not stitch it up myself.

HUSBAND – That’s true. I went from one extreme to the other.

 ME – Indeed you did – Thank you. Did you tell him what I said?

HUSBAND – Don’t worry – No!

ME – Tell him.

HUSBAND – about the…?

ME – Do I ever say things I don’t mean? Tell him.

HUSBAND CONVEYS MESSAGE HESITANTLY. A DEEP RUMBLING VOICE AT ONCE REPLIES.

HUSBAND – Here – I am not saying that to her.

SON – Yeah well, evil never dies – so you were no longer fun, Mum. Did you have a good day collecting souls?

ME – Of course I did – would you like your’s back? I’m having a sale. 

SON – no thanks – I’m good.

ME – Awww. LOVE YOU.

SON – Love you too – here’s Dad.

 

 

 

You may be shocked but that was the most affectionate conversation he and I have had for weeks – none of the surface chatter was what he and I were talking about. Do you see what I mean by that?

I see the banter very differently – as a temperature gauge – when they are truly at odds, they probably don’t speak at all.  

 

The Holmes Brothers are a whole ball of complicated, but don’t be fooled so easily.   Alone doesn’t protect them nearly as much as the illusion that they detest each other does.

 Magnusson certainly knew – which also supports a personal history. “Mycroft’s pressure point is his junky, detective brother,”

Magnussen was good at what he did – he even told us that Sherlock was hard to find a pressure point that worked and Charles saw right through the drugs ruse – So all Sherlock’s efforts were useless because he never fooled Magnussen – so if he saw straight through that – and we didn’t and still don’t for the most part then he throws out there – ‘But look at how you care for John Watson. Your damsel in distress.”

Charles just pulled the same trick on Sherlock that Sherlock played on Irene to get her phone and – IT WORKED the same. Fire shows our priorities.

Charles didn’t even have to pull a trick on Mycroft – he only had to observe.

 

Mycroft is a good big brother.

If Sherlock hated Mycroft – would he be the voice that guides him through his deductions?

I think that the worst thing for Sherlock is he has spent his whole life looking up to him and wanting to be just like him and he’s never ever been quite able to do it so he gravitates to the few things he does better than Mycroft – one of those things is to be an abominable brat – he’s perfected it.   Mycroft is lazy – So Sherlock is hyperactive (but he also goes into time periods in which he refused to even speak for days)

 Mycroft is polite, a master of social etiquette  – so Sherlock refuses to acknowledge he even understands how to do it. 

He deliberately makes life messes just to get under Mycroft’s skin.

Mycroft is the epitome of law and order – Sherlock picks locks and pockets and breaks into secret government labs.

Mycroft is a picture of the upper crust, posh, hobnobbing with heads of state – Sherlock knows all the homeless people, criminals and graffiti artists.

Mycroft effortlessly provides what people need without being asked and not expecting a thank you. Sherlock demands people provide him with special privileges and that he not be bothered with mundane things like eating, or paperwork or rules. 

The sibling dynamics are fantastic and not only that, but if they were two peas in a pod and never had a cross word - Wouldn’t THAT be boring. 

Mycroft as a brother is a rather exasperated man who quietly (and not always in appropriate ways) tries to SHOW his love for his brother with infinite patience and indulgence – Some days the frustration with Sherlock’s antics win. Can you really blame him for that?

Mycroft tries to be omnipotent but he is just a man and he does make mistakes.

Obviously, if he were perfect and really omnipotent then he and Sherlock would not have a childish feud going on. A feud takes two players.  Mycroft has his childish side as well. 

 

Wizard –

 

Ok so in His Last Vow, Sherlock is sent off to death by suicide mission and suddenly recalled.

Who is behind that? Adorable evil dead guy? 

What purpose could he have?

 

“It was some time before the health of my friend Mr. Sherlock Holmes recovered from the strain caused by his immense exertions in the spring of '87. The whole question of the Netherland-Sumatra Company and of the colossal schemes of Baron Maupertuis are too recent in the minds of the public, and are too intimately concerned with politics and finance to be fitting subjects for this series of sketches.” The Reigate Puzzle.

 

In our Sherlock – the Baron was the last threads of Moriarty’s web. In Serbia – Eastern Europe. 

So why didn’t big bad – hole in the head Jim just meet Sherlock on his own territory? Why not just let him run his mission then when Sherlock had lost all hope and preferably contact with his brother – why not just scoop him up and see if he can’t be wooed away from the side of the angels?

IF they DID stand on the roof and fake suicide at each other…

_____________Such an easy fix – OK going to fanfic you again --- sorry.

* * *

* * *

 

 

Angels Arch – by Howlynn

 

Sherlock rose slowly toward the light. Fear gnawed at him.  He didn’t want to be alive any more.  Why would death not take him? Had he not suffered enough?  He had been so sure that he had screamed his final notes of his last waltz. 

Moments before he had finally given up, he had visited John and Mary in his mind palace. They were a vision of bliss as they held the tiny squirming human up for his inspection.  His breath had stopped at the sight of the peculiarly curved nose.  He could suddenly see dozens of genetic markers that denoted this perfect beauty as a Watson.  He loved her instantly.  She made his pain and sorrow worth it. 

He had whispered, “Goodbye, Watson family. Live well.”   It had been the perfect peaceful end and now it was ruined because he had not bothered to die.  Stupid transport. 

He moved his wrist and fingers. Breathing hurt slightly but not like it had so often in the last month, since he was captured.  There were sheets rather than concrete against his skin. Startled to alertness he opened his eyes and forced a single word from his dry throat.  “Where?” He croaked without trusting his eyes.  There were drugs in his system. 

“You are going to be fine, Sherlock.” A quiet voice said. It was a voice from his darkest chambers of his mind palace. 

“Why?” Sherlock managed after a few sips of water, offered by no other hand than that of a living Jim Moriarty.

“Dangerous question, that. Call it pity?” Jim said looking off to the side.

“I don’t need your kind of pity. You don’t feel pity. Ever,” Sherlock panted trying to assess the damage and the immediate danger.

Jim set the water glass on the trolley-table and stood and ambled slowly toward the window looking melancholy and calm, his hands shoved in his pockets, he spoke again with an unnerving gentleness, “You will never play the violin again. Even I can appreciate the tragedy of that.  I tried to save it for you, but the doctor says the nerve damage was …extensive.  I should have come sooner.”

Sherlock was now frightfully confused. “You pulled me out?”

“Not personally. I have minions for the smelly little details.  I would never have even recognized you.  I couldn’t believe you were alive when I saw, in person, what they had done to you.” Jim smiled and dramatically held up his foot.  “Do you like my shoes?  I think the tattoos add a certain distinction to the common brogue. Don’t you? “

Sherlock swallowed but didn’t reply.

“You recognize them don’t you?” Jim said with a secret pleased smile. “Of course you do.  Did I get the right one?  The man who took your music away?  Doesn’t matter.  They are…all… dead.” 

“You wanted me dead? Why bother with all of this?”

Moriarty smiled sheepishly and shrugged like a little boy, caught in an embarrassment. “I didn’t expect you to Actually die. Don’t be stupid.  I let you clean out all my dead weight and problem children.  Appreciate your hard work and…dedication.”  Jim opened the blinds and more light flooded the room. 

“You blew off the back of your head,” Sherlock accused.

Jim’s eyes sparkled with pride and he said in mock awe, “And you fell, just like I asked you to. You just were not smart enough to stay buried, were you?  How Is your little pet these days?  Oh yes, he picked her. Do you ever wonder if they think about you?  Miss you?”  He turned back toward the window and almost whispered, “Did you miss me?”

“What do you want?” Sherlock asked in disgust.

Jim shook his head and shrugged. “I don’t want anything.  You are not my prisoner.  This is a proper hospital and you are free to make use of the window?  I recommend the lift at the end of the hall, personally, but that’s just a suggestion.   I simply want you to be aware that nobody knows you are alive.  Not yet.  It’s up to you if you decide to tell them.  They don’t deserve you, but it is your choice.  I won’t stop you.”

Sherlock groaned as he tried to shift his position. “I don’t understand.”

Jim came to his bedside and without a word he shifted the pillows and gave the bed a tug here and there making Sherlock more comfortable.

“I don’t either. He came for you before.  Why didn’t your brother come for you?  They let you down.  They let you die.  I couldn’t stand it any longer.  I had you pulled out and brought here.  It’s been weeks now.  They aren’t even looking for you,” Jim stated in bafflement. 

“It was better than prison.”

“Was it? Gus made me look like a philanthropist. Good riddance.” Moriarty shuddered in revulsion.

“Prison decidedly doesn’t suit me.”

  “I find it quite relaxing myself – a nice holiday from all your worries.  You think I would have let you rot in there?” Jim shook his head and giggled.  “You really are a bit daft.  What a waste.  I have always protected you, Sherlock.  And I always will.  The world isn’t very entertaining without you.”  Jim pulled a phone out of his pocket and set it in the drawer.  “My number’s in there.  So is your brother’s.  Get some rest and think things over before you decide which of us to call.” 

“They will just send me back,” Sherlock said as Jim reached the door.

“And I will pull you out. “

“What is your proposition? As an alternative?” Sherlock asked feeling off kilter.

“The thing about angels, Sherlock. We all started out thinking they were the good guys.  We all were angels once.  But maybe, it is all a lie and those of us who suffer the fall, are the ones that see the truth.  You can try to fight the east wind.  Or you can be the east wind.  It’s up to you.” Jim smiled again and without another word, the door swooshed closed behind him.

the end~~~~

* * *

* * *

 

 

Whee – that was fun. Sorry you had to suffer through my mind palace – well mine is more of a mind-golf course – but the club-house obviously has a lovely pub.

Do you see how easily Jim could have once and for all recruited Sherlock if he’d just let him head into an area that he was connected with recently?

So why has he come back and announced it? He’s a consulting criminal, the last thing he needs is anyone making his business harder by KNOWING he exists.  Didn’t he thrive on having a name nobody speaks?  Fame cost him. He would not make that mistake again.

Who do we know that could control the whole of media? Do you remember the first press conference?  Sherlock sent ‘wrong’ to all the reporters – wow wasn’t that exciting?

Not really – you probably get something similar if you live in a major tornado zone or a place that has seen terrorist activity – You mean like London 7/7 ?  Who might have access to the government national alert system?  Strangely, I can think of a possibility or two.

 

Let’s compare the way Mycroft looked when he thought his brother could be killed any second with how he looked when Moriarty came back to make his Telly comeback.

Mycroft isn’t horrified – or angry – or frustrated.

Look at him as he says "I hope you have learnt your lesson."

Mycroft is calm and cool and snarky.

Mycroft is Showing OFF!

Now let’s move on to The Abominable Bride   - can’t trust this vision completely but Mary and Mycroft are awfully chummy?  She seems to not understand how he could be back when they said Moriarty was dead – but isn’t it funny she isn’t using her skills to track that image source?  She’s indulging Sherlock – being cheeky to Mycroft and Sherlock keeps asking what they have been accomplishing while he was in exile?  (Funny – but is it?)

He’s been in solitary.

We had never before seen Mycroft and Mary together but they don’t seem like strangers. Do you ever wonder if Mycroft kidnaps her too?  I mean he snagged John within hours.  Mary would have to be vetted to associate with Sherlock. 

Unless she were Mycroft's  - however distantly .   (makes the brother shooting a bit dodgy but not impossible)

Anderson dreamed up a wild goose chase for Sherlock. I bet Mycroft’s wild goose chase would be much more clever.  I think there is a whole team of people who put this together in some form. 

Mycroft is the wizard king!

Mycroft is the man behind the curtain – projecting Moriarty’s giant head upon the land. Mary is forgiven – because SHE is helping.

 

 

Kindness

Huh? How does that word relate to Mycroft. 

Who sweeps in and fixes stuff for Sherlock? Why are these two barmy gits not in jail?

Why didn’t Lestrade lose his Job? Who paid Mrs. Hudson rent on the empty flat?

Maybe he did enjoy Sherlock getting a little lesson – (Don’t get caught little brother – see how I blend?) – but who else would have Gone to that kind of trouble for one wild-card asset?

Mycroft goes out of his way for people and he NEVER gets a thank you.

He gets blamed for everything! But he’s one of those people who does for everyone and nobody even notices until the one day he stops. 

I hope they don’t kill him, because a London without Mycroft would be a boring place. They can fake kill him for a while if they want to – but if we want Sherlock to not be the next ‘Spy in a suitcase’  then I vote that Mr. Sexylegs do fewer comic-cons and save the time to write so he can keep ACTING too even though the logistics of writing and being in front of the camera as well must be an absolute nightmare – hehehe – his loss would break our hearts. 

I want Mycroft to have a happy ending too – Mystrade is a go would be fantastic. Mythea would be adorable. 

**And that is my view of Mycroft – “We didn’t Burn him!” - Holmes**

(and if you don’t get that reference – go here right this minute!!!!)

<https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YOtpgz4L5d8>

I mean it – Go!

 

 


	4. Oh Sherlock – What do we say about coincidences?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When you eliminate the impossible and the improbable, all you are left with is ...probably still quite hard to prove - but could be the truth.  
> The more accurate the probability, the greater the possible error. The larger the acceptable range of inaccuracy, the more likely it is correct. (Yes Professor, I was paying attention in Statistics)  
> This chapter is not boring - but I do hope you are a fan of Dan Brown. I, coincidentally, am going to discuss how lazy the universe is not!  
> I will never rid myself of stilted archaic syntax (never learn Olde English) Sigh....
> 
> Well? Come On - we haven't a moment to lose!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I call flights of angels to guide thee, Mr. Rickman. For those of us left behind, know what we have lost and they have gained. Happy ending, love.

What do we say about coincidences?   What a rare universe we have here. 

Have you ever seen ‘League of Gentlemen?’ It is absolute madness in which these three guys play every part of an entire town full of nutters.  Mark Gatiss plays a hiker who goes into a ‘local shop’ and disappears.  Then he plays the police officer investigating the hiker’s disappearance …and he disappears.  (I think all the people who visit the local Shop in Royston Vasey and disappear, were Mark) 

Here is the first episode – it was shot long before Sherlock was dreamed up – but there are a few odd turns.  There are fun things that will come back and spin around this Sherlock and it’s actors.  So check it out and see if you can pick up things that you wouldn’t expect to see paralleled in Sherlock – This was Mark Gatiss’  first big hit – look how baby-faced and adorable he is!  

 

Here is the sort of thing I am talking about – Notice the hearse that goes by with the word ‘bastard’ in it is the same one that will be used in “The Empty Hearse” – or at least the same year model and the same Trick they used to announce series three of Sherlock.  

 See if you catch any other things and then I will give the list once everyone has had a chance to play.  Who knows, some of you will probably find things I missed or didn’t know about.

<https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DGntH-aOlWU>

Oh Sherlock – What do we say about coincidences?

The universe is rarely so lazy.

(Wouldn’t it be great if the universe were so ordered – OR isn’t it)

 

 

 

This is may be just a rant about some mad funny things that spin in the Sherlockian East Wind around this series but I am probably lying to you – you decide.

Of course the East Wind is both canon and the Mythical Breath of God – in some cultures it is the harbinger of change or bad luck.

Strangely, in the book of Mormon there are many references to the east wind. We all know ACD wrote about some Mormons, so must have been familiar with The passage in (Mosiah 7:31)  -- ‘If my people shall sow filthiness they shall reap the east wind, which bringeth immediate destruction’

Mary Poppins is brought by way of umbrella and East wind. (femlock Mycroft?  ROF)

Sherlock wanted to be a pirate – You know there is more to that red sky at morning saying – “ When the wind is blowing in the East,' Tis not fit for man nor beast,” 

There are tons of little links and coincidences tucked all around us in this show.

Some are just happenstance but others will honestly mess with your head a little.

 For example, Both Ben and Martin played ‘Richard the Third’ within months of each other.  One on stage, one on screen.  They teased each other about who did it better but were, of course, supportive of the other -  but what an odd parallel. 

\-------Because at this same time after nearly 500 years – Richard III was found – his DNA matched and it turned out Ben is his distant cousin – spoke at his reinternment - and the facial reconstruction of the long dead king was rather uncanny  in its resemblance to Cumberbatch in his role as the long maligned monarch. 

Ben played Kahn in the Star Trek Movie then did the Voice of Shere Kahn the tiger in Jungle Book. ( Shere Kahn loosely translates to ‘Tiger King’)

In ACD Sherlock – Colonel Sebastian Moran was a romanticized ‘Big Game’ hunter with a nickname of Tiger (Because he supposedly chased down into the sewers after a ‘Man Eating Tiger’ and saved a village)  

So – That means that Sherlock beat the ‘Tiger’ in Baker Street.

                                       The ‘Tiger’ beat Sherlock in the sewers. 

                                       Sherlock is also a tiger (the voice of one)

                                       But up in the Stars – Kahn is a genius villain rather than a tigerish hero --- Oh never mind – see how twisted this gets?  LOL

                                       Two promotion Photos for different programs -  showed Ben in a long coat looking over London – One was Kahn – London in ruins --- One Sherlock – upon his return. 

                                     

                                     

 

 

 

 

 

The Tiger

William Blake

 

Tiger Tiger. burning bright,

In the forests of the night;

What immortal hand or eye.

Could frame thy fearful symmetry?

 

In what distant deeps or skies.

Burnt the fire of thine eyes?

On what wings dare he aspire?

What the hand, dare seize the fire?

 

And what shoulder, & what art,

Could twist the sinews of thy heart?

And when thy heart began to beat.

What dread hand? & what dread feet?

 

What the hammer? what the chain,

In what furnace was thy brain?

What the anvil? what dread grasp.

Dare its deadly terrors clasp?

 

When the stars threw down their spears

And watered heaven with their tears:

Did he smile His work to see?

Did he who made the lamb make thee?

 

Tiger Tiger burning bright,

In the forests of the night:

What immortal hand or eye,

Dare frame thy fearful symmetry?

 

The Tiger

William Blake was written 1794. 

 

It has a sister poem about a lamb.

 

 

 

Right after school, Ben played in a show called ‘fortysomething’ with Hugh Laurie – Hugh would come to America to play Dr. Gregory House.  (The character is based on Sherlock Holmes – Dr Watson And Holmes are mushed together as a character – limping Doctor, drug addict, completely horrible,  who solves medical Mysteries – and all the seeming good is dumped into a very bland Wilson.) 

 

Ben co-stared with Johnny Lee Miller – in Danny Boyles stage play Frankenstein. The two of them traded off the parts of the Monster and the Doctor.   Later – Johnny Lee would come to America and be offered the part of an updated Sherlock Holmes set in New York. 

 

Ben played the part of a Dragon and a necromancer in the movie series – The hobbit (staring martin Freeman) with Ian McClelland – He would go on to play in the latest Holmes Film – “Mr. Holmes.” And there was another Holmes on set as well!

Another star of the Hobbit also played Sherlock Holmes – Christopher Lee cut a very dashing figure as Sherlock. And as Dracula for that matter – but he played Sauron the White – a wizard who will eventually be Gandalf’s nemesis.

<http://www.bakerstreetdozen.com/lee.html>

 

Gatiss and Moffat write both Dr. Who and Sherlock.

 ---------- 2nd Doctor claimed to have met Sherlock Holmes in his travels.

                4th Doctor dressed with a nod to Holmes in his Victorian London visit.

             5th Doctor lived in Victorian London at 107 Baker Street and claimed he and Sherlock were old friends.

               6th Doctor claimed Holmes was fictional. 

               8th Doctor was chased by a hound in Dartmoor and quoted Hound of the Baskervilles.

               11th Doctor auditioned for Watson and was cast as the Doctor then as the Doctor… impersonated Holmes!

               Wanda Ventham – Ben’s real Mum and also plays Sherlock’s Mum was a guest many times on Dr. Who.      Ben’s Mum, Wanda, was in Dr. Who with the seventh Doctor ,Sylvester McCoy,  and she had appeared in 13 episodes from 1967-1987. 

                The seventh Doctor was the woodsy wizard (Radagast) in Lord of the rings – staring with 3 Sherlock Holmes and a Watson - Was originally considered for Bilbo in the 1st three LOR movies.   As the Doctor he started out a bit of a buffoon but darkened into an eccentric manipulative genius who later questioned his own mistakes and decisions.

                Moffat says the Doctor is a God who wants to be human and Sherlock is a human who wants to be a God. 

                

 

 

**As Sherlock stood on the roof stretching his hand toward his friend and John lifted his hand toward him – we all felt out hearts breaking for the two of them. It seemed as if they were reaching toward each other.  If only their hands could touch one last time there would be –**

**_violins and angels and Johnlock!!!  Oh my._ **

 

 

Mark Gatiss played Dr. Lazarus in Dr. Who –and that was the inspirational nod to ‘Lazurus is a go’ in what most see as the ‘true’ story reveal – (which doesn’t work at all and therefore I believe it is John’s version)

 

There is also a Painting (SEBASTIANO DEL PIOMBO The Raising of Lazarus 1517-19 Oil on canvas) Which hangs in the National Gallery of London – would therefore be familiar to John and Sherlock As well as Gatiss. 

You will have to go look it up to follow my imaginings here – but once you see it – it is hard to simply put down as insignificant.

<https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Raising_of_Lazarus_(Sebastiano_del_Piombo)>

This painting is designated as the first one purchased by the National Gallery, so it is not obscure.

Look at the position of the hands of Jesus – his left hand looks rather exactly like that of Sherlock reaching for John. But look at Jesus’s right hand – it is in the very position that John’s hand took. 

Jesus is standing on a low stone work. (Whitish stone like Bart’s, actually)  In the background the Pharisees  are seen plotting the death of Jesus. Basically what is happening here is Lazarus has been given the third command from the Gospel of St. John which is “Unbind your shroud”  (The first being, ‘remove the stone’ the second, ‘Come out, Lazarus.’  - Even the bible has some Johnlock instructions – sorry – but…well…this is all just for fun)  

Now to me that sounds just a bit like “You see but don’t observe” or a secret between John and Sherlock (like Vatican Cameos) telling him to pay very close attention.

I know this feels like I am leading the life of Anderson here but please bear with me for just a few moments.

There are so many possible explanations for John’s behavior during the phone call. But here is another **_dog not barking in the night_** – What did John NOT DO? 

He never tried to talk Sherlock out of it. He didn’t say “please don’t do this – don’t leave me – I will never survive without my best friend – I lurve ya – Do a flip – can I have your cool coat?”  Nothing!

(And you missed it because it was foreshadowing in the first scene and they shocked you with thunder tears and Dead!) – What did John leave unsaid?

NOT LURVE and sentiment – and mush.

 John is terrified he SHOULD have said something to make Sherlock stop and instead just thought it meant he would not die and yet he appears to be dead so John is torturing himself that he should have said something sentimental, or inspirational or demanding or ANYthing.  ( If it would have helped, he’d have said he was a flaming, cross dressing, dalek, sheep fiddler – because you will say any words at all if they would have just not done…THAT!  )

(Yes I already know all the arguments –I came up with a few of them.)        

 John was in Shock – he didn’t know what to say – he couldn’t get it out – he was confused by the lies – he was panicking – and if those are the explanation, so be it – those work too from an author view.

But just like Sherlock – Moffat loves to be clever –(episode written by Stephen Thompson by the way – Not Moffat.  Moriarty says – You always want things to be so clever – it is your weakness)  So was it clever?

What exactly was said in those final seconds?

Look at the opening first – “My best friend Sherlock Holmes is dead"/// and I didn’t say the things I wanted to say - there is no point to say them now.

 **Then we go to a Painting – Lost and recovered.**   Turner’s masterpiece (Mrs. Turner next door has married ones) the falls of the Reichenbach – and a montage of Sherlock and John’s ‘best of times’.  The rising stars of London.

Did you catch the last name of the bad guy Sherlock caught when everyone chipped in for the HAT?

  Peter Ricoletti- does that last name sound familiar?  He was most wanted on Interpol.   That is beyond HUGE! 

Must be a really common name for the Abdominal Mrs. Ricoletti to have danced in Sherlock’s drug addled mind? ( It is a name from canon – but to be used twice?)   But they have done this to us before – Moriarty was not the only spider – was he?  In the blind Banker – the brother of Soo Lin was known as the spider also. 

There have also been two Napoleons – out of six? (The Adventure of the Six Napoleons) (Blackmail - CAM, crime - JIM .   Who will the next one be and for what?)

 

 

But back to Paintings and why it may be important –

  Where were the boys when Sherlock tells John the world is run on ciphers – codes – hidden messages.?

 They were in Trafalgar square heading toward the National Gallery – home to the’ The Raising of Lazarus’ to consult a Painting Expert (turns out to be a graffiti artist – LOL – around the **back door** ) which is of course a code for hacking into computer systems.  But Sherlock is carefully explaining that this is an ancient system that can’t be Cracked!

Old paintings are the Ultimate Symbol based code – (Dan Brown didn’t make that up – My favorite code of old paintings is the ‘Sign of St John’ and any time I see it – I pay very close attention to the rest of the painting. )

<https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/St._John_the_Baptist_(Leonardo)>    (This hand signal is the sign of John the Baptist in art-speak.  There REALLY is a da Vinci code – but Leonardo didn’t invent it – he worked within it though and Dan Brown just played with it to make a great adventure story that has some basis because  pictorial symbols were (and still are if you count company logos)  the propaganda of the day.  )

In the old days – the church (The real government of the day) could come after you for any infraction true or not –

(Like they did Oscar Wilde or Alan Turing) For a crime based on an obscure religious belief saying men must not ..well you know – have genital contact or any arse-kissing going on.

People used certain signs to say things they could later deny and Painters were the bad boy celebrities. Most people could not read but they could understand messages and pictures – (I can read coke in any language – because the picture stays the same) 

So back to Sherlock and a few more spins in my Mind Trap (It is a sand bunker – a few more shots and we will be at the green)  

 

We need to look at the Reichenbach conversation with this perspective to see that there could easily be more to it than --John is stressed out and acting contrary to his own character – Mr. Calm in an emergency – is suddenly acting like most of us would?

 

Sherlock tries to convince John that he’s a fake – John isn’t buying it at all and starts walking toward the building – not having any more of it – “No. All right, stop it now.”

Sherlock then raises his hand and tells John to stay exactly where he is and not to move – John raises his hand and says alright – (I know, could still be fear but it stopped John’s anger and he waited for Sherlock to explain – he didn’t even question that Sherlock didn’t have some plan from that spot on. )

“Please, will you do this for me? “

What is he asking him to do? Watch him die?  Give him strength to step into the abyss? Bear witness to his fall?  - Yeah, all of those things make sense too….

But if the hand signs are important, then it puts a different spin on what John says and doesn’t say.

That hand sign has restored John’s faith that there is some plan here. He asks ‘Do What?’ – expecting further instructions.

This phone call – it’s my note. (John is still trying to figure out the plan – he knows it is there and yet he can’t figure it out – drops the phone from his ear and tries to indicate – he is not IN ON What to do next – so he asks a stupid question -  “Leave a note when?”

(Okay – if you see a guy standing up on a roof crying – it isn’t going to take long for it to DAWN on you that he’s in a bit of danger – especially if he is wearing a billowy coat and it is breezy – could get sucked off in the downdraft. The stone could crumble – a bird could poop on him and make him lose his balance ---- it did NOT take John this whole conversation to figure out that Sherlock might be about to die.  )  John knew the second Sherlock told him to look at the roof – and John replied – “OH God!” with the unsaid – please let him live. 

So – if I am not in the middle of a ‘beautiful mind’ meltdown –

Sherlock has given John a hint – “It is a trick – Just a magic trick.”

He has given John a hand signal symbolizing – “have faith in me and pay attention” (Take the veil from thine eyes – Observe – cast off the shroud)

John has returned the symbol and is trying to determine what is required of him – NOT HOW to convince Sherlock that life is not boring or that he needs help or that he will miss him or that he will follow him if he does this horrible thing.

John is pretty steady in that he’s trying to figure out what Sherlock is trying to get him to do – until he actually says ‘Goodbye-John’ and tosses the phone away – THAT is the moment John is horrified again.

I know it all sounds a lot like putting a lot of circumstantial stuff in order to align with what I like.   But here is the other bit – What does John say at the grave? 

We saw John just sitting in his chair – lost and alone – waiting, as if expecting some word – (Yeah or in stunned grief – both work fine – as do double entendre)

Then he goes to the grave and says the Same thing he said as he tried to walk into the building – ‘Just stop this, will you do that for me?’ (with an unsaid – I did what you asked – now please make it stop)

 Give me that miracle you promised? 

“No, please, there’s just one more thing… one more thing: one more miracle, Sherlock. For me? Don’t ... be  dead. Would you do that? Just for me? Just stop it. Stop this.”

John saw him fall. He was pronounced dead.  Molly Hooper laid him out.  There has been a funeral.  There is now a poncy headstone.  So John has lost his mind – or he expects this to have a punch line – an end game – isn’t real. 

John is not asking for him to contact him from the other side. He is not asking him ‘Why have you done this to me?’ John is at war inside.

He is trying to have faith in Sherlock. (There had to be something said or done to make John believe in miracles)  John is a Doctor – do you think he sits around and drinks for months and still thinks his lost comrades and patients are going to reverse the final outcome? 

Lestrade comes by in Many Happy Returns – John never says it in front of Greg.

He speaks to the Telly and tells Sherlock – “I’ll tell you what you can do. You can stop being dead.”

Only this painting can explain to me why John – a doctor – could possibly be sitting around and privately have some faith that death is not permanent.

Lazurus rose from the dead – (So if my theory that John has also misdirected us on the explanation of Sherlock’s survival then it would explain – the phrase – Lazarus is a GO – it was the sign Sherlock gave John – and John is trying to believe in the preposterous.   The impossible)

Why We have still not seen the solution? The third one was John – not wanting to die without putting together a reasonable explanation – Sherlock wasn’t going to tell him – after John hit him for trying.  No time now – so John closes his eyes and imagines…

~~Anderson had driven Lestrade around the twist with theories - he'd lost his job - started a club - made them wear hats! – we have to assume he may have made some attempt to make amends to John over all that time.

~~There were 13 scenarios – like he said just before John came across the table for attack number two.

~~ Sherlock tells the story like a robot – a machine.

~~Perfectly planned – (I told you to have faith and you would not have suffered if you had not questioned me by believing your eyes - "the hound" taught us you can't always believe your eyes.)

~~Mycroft knew so we see him directing – John’s view of Mycroft.

~~The whole thing is John-centric – John needed to see a body – put John briefly out of commission. John is explaining it to JOHN as if he’s as stupid as Anderson. Poor guy – thinks he has lost Sherlock’s respect entirely.  (But also – it was Anderson who lost all- believing in Sherlock and acting like a fool, with no apparent hint or token, but John could at least say he was never alone in his hope – he was just smart enough to keep it to himself ) 

~~When Sherlock disappears from the hospital – John can’t think of anyone Sherlock would want to protect – even though they seem to all be in the room at that time – Anderson must have not wanted to share that he was right all along – didn’t show anyone the tape.

~~Don’t BE dead. Present tense.  Don’t actually be dead?  Don’t stay dead? Come back from the dead?  No – BE.  Don’t BE dead…  just stop this….  Archaic phrasing.  “To be or not to be.”

Back to the Bomb In the train – Sherlock makes the ‘scouts honor’ sign to promise John he will not tell anyone about the joke he just played on John – the trick. And rather than being even angrier – John just laughs!  (Hey at least you thought he was willing to take you with him this time – go out with a bang -  John is a gallows humor God.  And proabaly rushed right home and proposed properly – because they are having a little press conference party/informal engagement thing – ( I’d say John may have had a tiny reaction to Sherlock’s joke if you want to play in the johnlock corner OR the ‘Soldier happy to be alive’ decision of the day. ) 

I loved the fact Sherlock offered to die alone.  "Go John - just go"

John had 2 minutes - if he had run he could have been half a mile away and may have survived.  John didn't even consider leaving Sherlock to die alone - he chose to stay even if there was no hope.  Awww - do you really need Johnlock to have it be true?  Who needs a kiss when John would rather die than live in the world his idiot couldn't save. 

 

Here is another story to connect Gatiss to Lazarus.

 

http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=League+of+Gentlemen+Mark+Gatiss&&view=detail&mid=A0B93E2FAAB002BEADD8A0B93E2FAAB002BEADD8

The Cicerones (short film) – You know – coincidences (watch first 2 minutes and hear the Painting mentioned? Another version of the Lazarus tale) 

 

It is A ghost story. Gatiss loves those – (I would love to spend a night someplace haunted with him – he would be the most fun ever – and if there were a monster he and I would probably die poking at it but at least we would be giggling – well, you know, until the screaming and gory bits began.)

I really don’t have to point out all the Jesus on the cross references in the scene where Sherlock is rescued by Mycroft do I?

            Sherlock beaten.  He isn’t being nailed to a wooden cross – but by definition, he is being crucified because when he can no longer bear his body’s weight – and the burden rests on his extended arms – he will not be able to exhale and will suffocate. 

            The hair even?  It was adorable and I have made several references to his return starting a profitable new religion – hehehe – worked before – there is a precedent.

             Even Mary says “Oh, GOD!”  and Sherlock’s response is “Not quite.”  (Not just plain – noooo!)

So now we are at John’s reaction. Does it work with my theory?

 Let’s sound it out and see what you conclude. 

_**If any of my dead people ever walk through the door – the first thing I will do is simply touch them – to see if they are real. I don’t care why or how or anything about the time away – I know what the world is like without them and I hate every second of it.  I endure it and I have gotten practiced at it but I will never ever get over it.  If I got that – nothing would allow them out of my sight and I would not ask a single question – I would just hold them.  Smell them and thank every deity’s name I could think of all the way back to Egypt.** _

But I know that won’t happen.

John was startled – relieved – hurt - then angry.

Oh, it was delicious and powerful and hilarious and Martin Freeman was brilliant.  

He was not, however, unable to comprehend that it had been fake all along. We saw him alone and still asking Sherlock to stop being dead probably just a bit before he met Mary. 

He isn’t angry that he did it – he is FURIOUS that it went on for so long that John had lost his faith.

**Two years – Two years. You let me grieve.  How could you do that?**

(Sherlock wasn’t just being cruel – he wanted to jump out of a cake – He expected John to still believe in him. How could he have expected that if he had not told him? )

(OUR BAD BOY WRITERS have always maintained that we missed a clue – people have analyzed the footage frame by frame and killed themselves with mathematical analysis – even visiting THE ACTUAL location and measuring angles – hehe – like a crime scene. )

There is a saying where I live – “That dog don’t hunt” ignore the crude redneck vernacular and Grammar and just understand what it means –(Dr. Phil made it much more broadly popular) - _What you are saying may be true but the reasoning behind it is getting you nowhere because there is more to this story or you may be telling me a lie to make yourself look good but it does not work as stated._  

For Sherlockians – **We have a dog not barking in the night** – John is angry.  So angry he wants to make Sherlock dead again and doesn’t want to help him solve any terrorist plot or relive the good old days – how dare Sherlock even bring them up because John has spent more time without Sherlock than he has WITH him ???  Anger – anger – more anger.  Then he leaves. 

Where was the wonder – the joy – the need to be near his zombie best friend – his Lazarus – his miracle?

If John had suffered like we think he has – killing Sherlock would have come later. John had given up and that is why he is so livid.  John had suffered more by this slow horrible death of his hope and his belief – (Like a Mum waiting for her soldier son to come home and hoping one more day until she realises it has been too long – or a missing person – the loved ones in limbo. See – doesn’t even have to be Johnlock love for it to work ) 

If Sherlock had just sent him word to confirm that he’d kept his ‘promise’ then John would not have had to suffer like he did. People will kill people to hang onto a belief. 

(People will verbally do it if you like a character on a Telly show they don’t like – ROF)

People say John can’t act and that is a lame, lame excuse.

He acts all the time. 

He acts pleasant when he is furious.  He kills people and chats pleasantly with the police. He hides how much his bills are bothering him.  He pretends to be interested in his girlfriends and can’t even tell them apart any better than Sherlock.  He pretends to be kind and cuddly when he is a BAMF in disguise.  He had to have lied to Greg and Mrs. Hudson to be in the empty house with Sherlock after promising to keep Greg in on the loop and not go off on his own.  He pulls rank on guards.  He doesn’t kill Sherlock most of the time when he so plainly wants to when nobody is looking.   He deals with the most boring patients and icky conditions on earth and pretends to be interested and respectful.  He lugs a handgun all over London with a straight face and never breaks a sweat – something that is instant Jail time – and John is around police officers all the time – naturally suspicious people and he never causes them to blink twice at him.   John can’t act – Ha.

There is more to this story.  Is this the hint we missed? 

I don’t know. I suspect.  Ponder for a while and see if you can get it out of your head as completely ridiculous?

And hey "johnlock is a go" people?>>>>> Have you not noticed that Sherlock's suit is a Watson Tartan? In his mind palace?  Where is the swooning and kissing fics?

Oh and why does Sherlock have a modern torch when he discovers the body? That was when I really decided this was fishy.

We also have a dismembered country squire - Would any of you like to place bets on what is IN the box John won't let Archie carry in? Did you see the way John looks at his hand as he sets it in the kitchen? The legs were still missing, so the head won't be missed if we just nick that. ROF  

The next thing we will talk about is Molly the cross dressing/slapper – but it may be a few days – because this is eating my life – and my goldfish are getting a bit cranky with me. Thanks for joining me and I love all the comments – will try to respond between getting something to eat and my eyes giving out for the day.  Laterz!

 


	5. Oh Sherlock - What have you done?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things about Sherlock that you need to see in order to observe.

Oh, Sherlock. What have you done. 

 

 

Everyone loves Sherlock and yet when he is an arsehole, which is most of the time, they are confused by that adoration and play him off as innocent.

LOL – My own innocence rivals Sherlock – because I consider arsehole a term of endearment.

 (So innocent must be another term for arsehole – see this is why inductive reasoning  is flawed.  What Sherlock does, is not only deductive reasoning,  but also abductive reasoning.

 (The Science of Abduction just sounds wrong doesn’t it?  No I didn’t come up with that witty bit – it is a longstanding funny from the first season after being watched by an actual logician. (One who studies the science of logic))

So what is deductive reasoning? It is also called top-down logic.

Here is the definition.

Deductive reasoning links premises with conclusions. If all premises are true, the terms are clear, and the rules of deductive logic are followed, then the conclusion reached is necessarily true.

**Sherlock is a man.**

**All men are mortal.**

**Sherlock is mortal**.

 

It can go wrong if your premise is flawed. You can have a valid logical conclusion that is still not sound. 

**Men who come back from the dead are God.**

**Sherlock came back from the dead.**

**Sherlock is God.**

It IS always something – LOL.

What this tells us is the Premise must be true for it to work. The fly in the ointment to pure deduction. 

So you must also use the law of contrapositive (in a conditional, if the conclusion is false, then the hypothesis must be false also)

 (Sherlock used this in the blind banker to show that it could not be a suicide because the dead guy was left handed)

What is abduction? Well – that would take volumes so I will try to do it without the mumbo-jumbo. 

You have an outcome. You have to work backwards to explain this outcome.  You make a good guess and see if you can prove it will work.

Relating to Sherlock….

We have a dead guy. We have 18 guesses of how he got to be a dead guy.  Each truth (Clue) is a standard by which to remove the false guesses.   When you get down to one guess the puzzle must be solved because it is all you have failed to eliminate.

**When you eliminate the impossible and the improbable, what you are left with must be the truth. – Sherlock Holmes.**

The problem is you must have the actual answer on the list of guesses.

Think of the man in the trunk of the car – 8 ideas – okay three ideas – and then it is unsolved – until we see the Bond Air fiasco and then we suddenly understand that the dead guy in the trunk – was already dead and somehow missed his plane. The one that already blew up.  If that guess had been in the mix from the start – Sherlock could have solved it.  Because it would have been the only thing left .

Abduce - means to lead away.

Deduct - means to subtract.

This is how Sherlock does his magic. It is a complex dance with seeing what is important.  But you also have to get rid of the unimportant.  (How about that New Sherlockians – this is a real thing!)

His mind is lead away to discard all the unnecessary and he does it without the bog of feelings and only being able to see one perspective at a time.

Statistically murder is most often committed by someone known to the victim.   Police must eliminate anyone the victim knew, one at a time.  This causes all kinds of hurt feelings and anger because the parent with a dead child, knows he didn’t kill his child and feels like while they harass him at the most horrific time of his life – further destroying him – that the actual killer is out there laughing at his pain.  This gets very ugly when you get the press involved and yet – we are glued to our telly all the time just because someone is brought in for questioning – they rarely go back and proclaim the innocent suspect (now eliminated) INNOCENT and that hangs over their lives for all time – sometimes even after the true killer is brought to justice.  That planted idea will always follow – Moriarty used that very  angle to discredit Sherlock. 

The other problem is – once the police have a theory – they will cling to it tenaciously even if it is wrong. But we won’t get into the budgeting –solve rate – political nightmare law enforcement deals with – just see the fact that overworked underpaid people can easily get bogged down in the need to pursue the only conclusion they are capable of seeing. 

There is a solution to every puzzle – every mathematical mistake in the system. From a drop of water there is the possibility of an ocean.  That does not mean we know to infer the reality of its existence. 

That is why it is important for Sherlock to abhor emotions. (The Spock complex)  Logic will not work if you allow emotional attachment to sway your sight. 

We do see this flaw written in this program. Logically Sherlock should have seen Mary and known she was an assassin.  He can’t see past his emotion and fondness for her and he therefore does not see that she will pull the trigger – and she did.  Irene Adler had the same effect – he could not see.  We got ???? as he tried to deduce her. 

He is the same about John. He is constantly in a battle to predict this unpredictable man – constantly surprised by him.  John is the “It is always something” in his life and that makes him far above ordinary in his mind. 

 

John as Sherlock’s Jiminy Cricket.

Bit not good, yeah.

Why doesn’t Sherlock realise…..

John has stepped into Sherlock’s life to play his conscious. He does not devalue Sherlock because he has a blind spot – he becomes Sherlock’s extra set of eyes. 

But if he isn’t a sociopath – where did Sherlock’s emotions go?

They are there – they just work differently.

 

 

As children, we are taught to always tell the truth.

“Gosh, Aunt Blow-hard, your breath stinks like Dad’s other girlfriend when she drinks Mom’s vodka.”

 

Then we tell them to lie.

We have names for these lies. Politeness.  Kindness. Flattery. Socially acceptable.

We tell children lies – Just be yourself and they will like you.

To someone who is obsessed with logic everywhere they look, they see the lies. There are rules to lies that people learn from experience ** _._**

 ** _If I had not told her that the dress makes her look like a school bus, she would have offered me more cake.  If I had not told him that his Mom has ugly teeth, he would not have punched me._** (We learn social interaction from a vague emotional logic that links action to consequences.)

In logic – the truth is the key. If A and B then C

 Pure logic does not factor in -- but because C is not polite you have to jump to H as the answer. 

Sherlock can’t find any premise to these ridiculous useless interactions so they have no value to him.

**“How’s the weather, Joe?”**

**“Bit chilly for me.”**

 

 

**A look at social niceties from Sherlock’s brain.**

“How’s the weather, Sherlock?”

_He is addressing me. We are standing three feet apart. The weather patterns are similar in our mutual location. He is clothed similar to me within acceptable standards of necessary warmth. Can he not determine the weather from his location?  Is he blind? Does he have a condition that precludes him from using his skin to determine the atmospheric condition? He is smiling, though I have given him no reason for the muscular calisthenics to create a smile.  He is really concerned with the fact his feet hurt and his knees are out of alignment because his shoes are worn by his weak ankles turning in, causing him to be in constant pain.  His back hurts too. Why is he smiling at me, obviously fake, asking me about something he himself could determine, when he should be out buying shoes.  Why would someone put up with constant pain when for a few quid, they can have their shoes fitted to compensate for his physical flaws and thus no longer have to fake a smile.  Or, there are the cholesterol spots on his eyelids telling me he is in exceedingly poor heath and needs to cut sugar and fake butter out of his diet if he wishes to live another decade.  Yet here he is waiting for me to explain the fact that the wind is seven knots and the temperature is four degrees on the Celsius scale when he should be thinking about his triglycerides and his imminent heart surgery.   Why would he do that? Because he is an imbecilic liar with no time management skills.   Oh yes, inane social interaction. I should respond. Where is that file on blathering? Oh yes, here we are… no. no. no.  I should provide something helpful instead._

“You need new shoes and a heart check-up.”

_Now he’s bloody offended! I hate people._

Sherlock can mimic the simple everyday interactions but frankly they defy logic and it requires effort to turn off the way his mind constantly links things to put together something that is a complete waste of time. Sherlock is not an emotional cripple in any way.  He chooses to have a wall up to protect himself from imploding at the constant disapproval and criticism.  His mind is different.  Not bad and not cruel but he has embraced a form of cruelty simply to keep all the things that can hurt him at a distance so they do not infringe on his best feature – his logical mind. 

As a child, he was probably an absolute terror. “Hellish, I imagine.”  Mycroft told us and he would be able to imagine, having grown up with him.

So let us infer what Sherlock may have been praised for by his role models? Leaps in logic, intelligence, talent such as violin, neat appearance.   (Most kids are praised for such things, those who are praised for drawing may become artists, those for good behavior, policemen. )  

What if a child is abused? It is a toss up – there is no absolute.  Despite feel good psychology – abuse is no excuse to grow up and kill people. One sibling may go on to be an abuser whilst the other from the same family may swing far the other direction and have a need to serve society.  You can’t class every abused child or every indulged child into any box unless you also take into account his talents, personality markers and even nutrition.  So what does it tell us?  Nothing. 

But, for Sherlock – we can infer that some event made him want to develop certain traits and suppress others.

 

To profile him –

He would have been highly excitable (Still is) and probably had severe emotional breakdowns that became the constant hub of his families’ activities We can’t go to the zoo, Sherlock is having a meltdown.  If we let you go, you will not discuss/touch/act like – etc.  (We all know these warnings from childhood or the other end – parenthood) 

For Sherlock, when he did manage to control his every impulse – he was praised – Mycroft was praised – he got to do stuff and yet for some people – all the praise in the world will not FIX what simply is. There comes a point where the effort to reward ratio zeros out. 

He wants to be good – he lives to be praised – (like perhaps Mycroft is) but if he relaxes even a little then the next thing he knows is, all his hard work has just been wiped out. That does not speak of bad parenting or abuse in any way – but I do know, from my own experience, that you cannot spank or reason the ADHD out of someone who actually has it and once upon a time in the not so distant past – that is exactly what the strategy was.

 (There is still a joke on facebook of ‘this was the ADHD medicine of my day ‘– The sad truth is – the pictured belt actually was the solution and it was considered good parenting too)

He is told how intelligent he is and those around him do shower him with accolades hoping to reinforce good behavior. That isn’t enough either. 

(ADHD has a friend – they often intersect. One is not the other but they have lots of cousins – so to speak)

The thing about ADHD isn’t just ‘can’t pay attention’ – there is also a hyperfocus side to it. (Sometimes)  What that means is that IF there is something interesting, it is the equal to a time warp.  Twenty eight hours focused on one task – is not unheard of.  Six is nothing.  It feels like five minutes. 

Then the world slows down and you are Dr. Who – barmy and able to do ten things while others stand around telling you why you can’t.

When I was a child, to be labeled **Autistic** – you basically had to sit in a corner, stim, and be non-verbal.  They were not being mean, nor has Autism made the leaps of some chronic pandemic.  What has changed?  The understanding and therefore the ability to teach coping strategies, and the definition has broadened by literal miles and therefore more people fall into the category once excluded by scientists. 

Kids haven’t changed. The definition did. 

Once, brilliant people who changed the world were often called eccentric – Weird – Odd – Absent minded professors – idiot savants.

They were also called crazy and often wasted away in homes- living deplorable lives of sorrow I cannot fathom.

 The lucky ones had families who found a way to make them suppress the ‘bad’ behavior and find some niche in which they could contribute to the world and get by – pass as mostly normal. 

They were always here. They can be the Mozarts and the Lewis Carrolls and the Michelangelos and the Teselas.  The personal lives of these people can be quite abysmal yet they are remembered for their work. 

There are those who feel this may be an ability rather than a flaw. A brain that works like a computer yet has the ability to know right from wrong.  The father of computers, Alan Turing, quite obviously was one of these odd people. 

Autism is blamed on all sorts of things these days from vaccines to the water. Mostly we only hear about it in children and yet many child prodigies are also on the spectrum.  (Not all autistics are brilliant any more than all cars are green – there are many levels and the idea that all autistic people fit in any box is a pure myth.)

But, there are those who exist and do fit in this realm. We do hear about them or know about them and it is more common than once thought.  So, where do they go? 

What happens to kids who have these amazing brains?

We grow up.  

Life does not get any easier. We learn how to hide better. 

My first hero was Sherlock Holmes. He made it Okay to not be able to stand all the frivolous crap that seems to be the stock and trade of the likeable people.  He made it Okay that I could see them faking their way through the daily dance.  He helped me learn to do it.  The disguises hiding in plain sight, the ability to charm – and the ability to choose not to let people hurt me simply because they could – to be above it – all came from Sherlock Holmes – well and Robin Hood. 

I was not the most popular person on the planet in school – but there was not one group I could not sit down and fit in with.

I can’t maintain it long term though.   Eventually I slip up. 

Here is the really funny thing – I tell people I am borderline sociopath – it is a great cover.

See – the weird thing about people is that if they are told that they have to earn your friendship because you can hurt THEM – then they will. It is a challenge and when they gain it – they appreciate it and any issue you have – they will overlook.

If you tell them you are damaged/broken/mentally different – they instead just feel sorry for you and avoid you – Nothing you say will ever matter to them. Pity is horrible.  It also attracts a certain sort of do-gooder con-man who will eat you alive. 

  Fear is far easier to deal with.  The worst of them – the cowards and con-men – will run from you.

 The honorable don’t fear you because they have no intention of ever taking advantage of you. 

(I don’t know for sure how the writers knew to include this little gem but I am not the only one who does this – so the first time he said – High-functioning Sociopath – my ears perked up. Don’t tell them to do their research, Sherlock – it will ‘out’ you because THAT is not a real thing)

Then WHY can’t he feel things and know that things are a ‘bit not good’ on his own?

Because he comes from the tail end of our modern world when this sort of behavior was trained out of us with spankings and lists of rules and punishment. It took one hell of a parent to Make us Fly – but there are consequences for this philosophy. 

In 1895 – if you beat a child to death – for behavior – it was the child’s fault for acting up. There were no X-ray machines to see the injuries.  Animal abuse was maligned before child abuse. 

“Yet in the late nineteenth century, there were established philanthropic societies for intervention on behalf of children neglected or mistreated by their parents. The model, ironically, was the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals, founded in America in 1866 and followed afterwards by SOCIETIES FOR THE PREVENTION OF CRUELTY TOHILDREN in America and England in the 1870s and 1880s.”

<http://www.faqs.org/childhood/Bo-Ch/Child-Abuse.html>

 

Sherlock was always the product of a differently programed mind. Even the use of cocaine to ‘clarify’ his mind speaks of ACD (as a doctor) being familiar with the effects of a stimulant on certain behaviors – it was prescribed.  Now we have meds but they are highly regulated and just as dangerous long term. 

 

What happens when someone is repeatedly abused or made fun of for say Crying? They learn not to.  This is especially true of boys. 

We see Watson doing that – hiding that he cries.

What if you have to suppress it all? The only way to deal with a ‘meltdown’ is to let it all out or shove it down so deep it stays away.  Which one did Sherlock do? 

You can’t just turn it off and on – he can fake it like an actor.

Umm – yeah – you can. You can suppress it for delay.  What do you suppose Sherlock does in his room when he’s ‘in a snit’ – needlework?  (yes that was a pun)

He is purging the emotional buildup of crap. Not saying he’s crying – it can be done mentally and all you will see is silence.  In that mind palace he could be raging – breaking the furniture – killing everyone -  Growing huge like Alice and stomping all the little morons. 

Mine is more of a golf-course but I do have sand traps and fire-ants. I also have a snake pit.  Mostly I have golf-balls with faces on them and I hit them into the water hazard. 

As the years go by – this once fragile façade becomes who you are.

 

Sherlock is played in this realm – without identifying it or making fun of it. In fact, it is sort of part of his super-power and that is really quite lovely.   There have been some very ugly people out there who have found this offensive. 

I will borrow a quote from John Barrowman -   I’m an openly gay man playing an omnisexual hero, who is loved on both sides of the Atlantic. How could I not be proud of that?

(He played Jack Harkness on the Dr. Who spin off – Torchwood)

The biggest new hero is an old hero and he happens to have a vaguely explained, differently-wired brain and he is not just the IT nerd – his brain is his power – How could anyone see that as derogatory?   Oh well if you pass out free money – someone will be offended by the calories.  (Same logic – lol)

 

John is allowed to criticize him.   (Sherlock does get hurt feelings and offended by John’s comments)  He listens because John also loves him.  John rarely tells him he is wrong to be as he is – but when he sees Sherlock in (WTF) mode trying to figure out what is the thing that will get this boring crap over fastest – John jumps in and tells him the answer. 

“Just say, thank you.”

“Clever is fine, let’s give smartarse a wide berth.”

‘Just put it on and get it over with. Smile’

John finds him Charming.   That gives John a free pass to help – because he is covering a blind spot – not ridiculing him.  Laughing with him – not at him.  Sherlock knows the difference – most people do. 

Sherlock bristles when john bursts out laughing after they chased the taxi – then John explains – “Nothing…just…welcome to London?”

Back at the flat – the ice has been broken – John GETS Sherlock. That is amazing – ten times so to someone who rarely feels included or understood. 

So you see? When Sherlock says he doesn’t have friends – he’s only got one.  He is telling the truth. 

What about Lestrade? He’s his friend.

Not in Sherlock’s mind. It is a business transaction.  He gets puzzles, Lestrade gets job security.  Even after the little girl screamed, Lestrade said, “I usually feel like screaming when you enter a room as well.” 

Lestrade thinks Sherlock might be his friend and he is fond of him – but Sherlock doesn’t know that.

What about Molly?

Still business transaction until the ‘I see you’ conversation. Sherlock does not realise why she likes him.  In his mind it is a trade on a possibility – Molly gets to hope for dates if she is patient and in some ways he does give them to her – they just happen to be lab time – He gets body parts and she gets a pseudo boyfriend when it suits her. 

He isn’t being cruel. He sees himself as a place holder until someone comes along.  (Not that horrid little Jim though)       That is important – why did he not see Jim was Moriarty?  Emotion – he is attached to Molly.  He ran Jim off – because he was not good enough – he thinks he can still deduce HER and he can’t because she is much deeper than he knows. But she helps him fake his death and now he has two friends.

Mrs. Hudson? Former client. Appreciates him for life.  He does suspect that she is his ‘something’ and he is terribly fond of her and comfortable in her life.  Motherly figure more than ‘friend’  

He has lots of ‘friends’ In a casual capacity – homeless network – Chip Shop owners evidently – Angelo – But these things are based on what his brain DID for them.

He did not have to solve a crime for John to get him to like him – Didn’t have to save his life – liked him before he cured his limp and then – for no reason at all – John Watson saved his life by killing someone expecting nothing in return.

(By the way – there needs to be some pond translations here really quick…

                HOB – ‘Going to see a man about a dog’ – That is a way of saying ‘none of your business’ – (It doesn’t mean a trip to the bogs/toilet like in the states)

                THE – ‘Helped him put up some shelves’ ----Erm – Putting up shelves is a euphemism for sex – related to explaining to the neighbors that knocking sound last night – the headboard banging. Oh we were just putting up some shelves!   (So I am a little frightened that Sherlock “HELPED” and now gets extra portions -  ROF – He either helped him Pull some impossible girl/boy OR he helped him with the act – Oh Sherlock – you wonder why we write you in threesomes?  I simply cannot surmise about the extra portions – but not free food, without getting kinky so…shutting up now. )

 

Hmmm – where was I?

 

Okay so Back to friends – are Sherlock and Mary friends?

SHE SHOT HIM!

Yes. They probably are.

From Sherlock’s perspective – Mary understands him better than THIS john does. He is counting on her to explain things that make John angry at Sherlock.

She has played bridge.

If Sherlock made John choose between pregnant Mary (his daughter) and Sherlock – what would you imagine the best outcome could be? John would end up hating him.  The child would hate him. 

Every person in the ‘family’ including Sherlock would be destroyed by that rift. (His fake parents can’t divorce and leave him an orphan!  He forgives her because it is the only outcome he could possibly stand.  I do think he wants John all to himself – but not if it means breaking him.)

Sherlock is insecure at his core and if Mary and he can’t heal – then in all probability he will lose John too.

His most deep seeded self believes he is only as loved as he is useful. If he stops being brilliant - nobody could possibly care about him. Not even John – as he’s demonstrated. 

Why would Sherlock think otherwise? People are idiots. 

 They don't care about the beautiful when they get ugly - they don't care about the strong when they get old - they don't care about the brave when they come home damaged and they won't care about the clever if they stop being clever

 John will carry on - John tolerates him and finds Sherlock less frustrating than most people - the bravest(Puts up with him)) and kindest(doesn't hate him) and wisest (explains things to him like why the truth is not the correct thing to say)Man can survive without him – but Sherlock would just  - well – OD?

Some days he may long for whatever it is other people can do that makes them fit in - but mostly it is his greatest pride that he can do things better - and giving up that pure joy would not be worth the chance at some other kind of joy.

 

It is like a person who has never seen the color orange. They don't know they are missing anything and they actually see a spectrum far out of range of their neighbor - edging into ultra-violet. Would he give up one thing for something he has never seen? That is love to him - It exists and theoretically he would like to understand it - nobody made him this way - he made himself this way.

In HLV -

Sherlock was not being mean to John or saying Mary was his fault - he was telling the truth....no more no less. (same thing he did to Molly about Gay Jim)

Everything about who you actually are, led you to her - that is true of us all - (I know because my own life has certain parallels and they are not my fault but most certainly had to do with the sort of people I bond with and the attractions I cling to without quite seeing it until it all has blown up and I can analyze from hindsight)

We are all the sum of our choices - painful as that is to know.

Sherlock even admits it in his 1895 mind palace - not making any excuses - I love that.

"Oh Watson. Nobody made me. I made me!"

John is like a first pet - Sherlock will fiddle it to death or squeeze it too tight or overfeed it and fail to water it. He feels he’s going to lose John at some point anyway - to death or he will grow tired of Sherlock - They do have the very best times and he will do anything to hold on to that - But being able to really appreciate the whole picture and having an instinct for what is okay -- no he really is repressed in that area.

People often interpret the Reichenbach phone call as cruel on Sherlock’s part. I have to say – I never once thought it was.

         He sent John away – John came back.

             He tried to tell John that he was not worth caring about – because he’s fake – John didn’t buy it. 

                         He let John know that his last thought in life was about him.  Horrible, but it is an entire abyss of lovely too.

**If Sherlock were dead - really dead - what was the motive for exactly what he said.**

First - it was always possible he would never return from his fake death because a real one may take its place.

Think of what he was intending to do. He was going to single-handedly stalk and destroy an international web of criminals that MI6-CIA-Interpol and Bundesnachrichtendienst can’t manage to take out – with a zillion agents and huge resources – why does everyone assume this one really smart guy can? 

Sure he Plans to win – but he really knows the odds are not in his favor – Sherlock is playing 70 rounds of the Hunger Games back to back – his six month death sentence punishment later in season 3 cannot seriously be any worse than this.

Well there is one way the 6 month suicide mission would be worse – If he was to be playing the role of the’ disposable’ agent then there is no hope of coming home.

 (The Disposable is someone who is given up AS an agent to save the position of other agents – in other words if we tattle on this guy and let him be tortured and killed – it saves 5 other agents from being compromised -  you think that is mean to send one guy to his death ?  We send soldiers – police officers – firemen – to the same fate every day to protect the greater good – same concept)

So what he said on the roof of St. bart’s was to make it easier on John - but he couldn't quite pull it off because his own emotions were too raw. To me - he made John watch - not to be cruel - but because he needed to draw strength to pull it off.  He was not crying for effect – because they were just too far away to see – Sherlock was crying for the loss he was about to deal himself. 

Second - jumping off a building carries risk - no matter the plan and it IS possible he's about to die or be damaged forever (That is why they have stunt men for these shots - it is never safe)

He was not being mean or heartless or stupid or cruel. He was doing the best he could from the perspective he understood in that moment. 

Keep this in mind – he had to take drugs to say Goodbye on the tarmac – he was high when he shook hands with John.

** So How could Sherlock forgive that horrid mean Mary, you whine?  **

Now - do understand - Mary is a liar - a faker - an operative with some motive - but that doesn't mean she has played John from day one - can't rule it out but there are other possible explanations as well. (hardly ever explored --yet in line with canon)

We would have to see - how John Got that job - when Mary was hired - (if she was hired before he was then that would make the idea of her setting out to trap him/watch him/protect him - go bogus on us because she was there first. )

The universe may not be lazy but Mycroft is not the universe - if Mary was under the protection of one of his colleagues - Mycroft may have not been aware of her for some time. He does have a Government to be and Sherlock messes to clean - he delegated others to report on John and nothing stood out as interesting enough for him to do more than glance at the file.

So we would have a John dealing with survivor guilt AND having a history of suicidal thoughts - (and I am all about that Johnlock too though I don't need it to be THE GOAL of the whole series - it has always been there to me)

Mary falling for him through a sniper rifle or by order or just by dumb luck - I maintain that she is analytical and direct and saw something in him she wanted - and loves him to some degree.

 

Sherlock says John can trust Mary because _he has proven it._

Sherlock can trust her with JOHN. She will kill Sherlock in a heartbeat –But that isn’t important. The important detail is that BLOODY MARY will do anything to protect what Sherlock loves the most!  

 He knows that he may be dead again as he tells those lies in Baker street – he knew the chance he was taking when he left the hospital and if john had not shown up to help when he did, she probably would have simply killed him – but he also knows that ,if he is dead, that he can safely put John in Mary’s hands provided the love/human error part of the relationship is strong. 

 

Sherlock has a trained attack dog to protect his beloved - Of course he forgives her and influences John to do so as well.

(Because WE may see all the happily gayness ever after - but the characters do not - John is very vocal about it - Gay men do not hit on their straight friends - that is a straight-man egotistical bullshit myth to justify his prejudice - (at least if you are over the teen mess and have lost friends due to error)

 

Sherlock truly believes he must live with the allowed bits of John's love. He does not have the ability to give him true contentment.

 

**She saved my life – was a lie on the surface but it was the truth underneath.**

How would Sherlock have been if John were dead when he returned?

How long would he have lasted if John had not forgiven him? (Approximately 30 days or a plane ride by accounts so far)

If Magnussen had burned John to death because Mary didn’t understand the text or didn’t bother with that arsehole friend of her boyfriend – Sherlock would have probably died burning the world to the ground trying to blot out the picture of John perishing as Guy Fawkes – given the death of a traitor – people cheering while he died?   Can you picture a Sherlock with his heart truly BURNT OUT?

She Shared John when she had every right in the world to be a wedge between them. She is what John picked over a life with him and yet she made him like her enough that he vowed to always protect her as well – NO MATTER WHAT.  See, when Sherlock loves – it is without condition.  He may not trust her – but he will forgive her and protect her.  That is what he gave his word to do – HIS ONLY VOW ever. 

 

We have seen that Sherlock can be wrong in so many ways! In the first episode we  saw a few – corpse beating,  not paid for it-just gets off on it, who cares about decent, drugs history, pickpocket, and that stupid pill.  (Thank GOD he actually was right about the CGI lighter gun!  Cause it would have been a really short series if he made an oopsie there – speaking of a bit not good!) 

He may be wrong about Mary - but he probably has this one important thing right.  She will protect John. 

 

 

The pill.

The morality murk of gallows humor – and murderous party games

 

I honestly have four separate arguments, each of which prove it was the wrong pill. None would provide definitive proof with a zero margin of error but when you look at them all, the statistical probability of Sherlock having survived the outcome are very tiny.

** One -  **

The cabbie was beaten the second Sherlock called his bluff about the fake CGI flamed gun. From that second - the cabbie had no power and had lost his carrot to dangle. "See you in court." Mr. Hope had shown his hand and HIS game was over.

Except, we are not paying attention to the funny, creepy cabbie

We are LOL that Sherlock is so clever and WOW he has a swirly coat and Bye-bye creepy little....

We are not paying attention.

He is a genius hiding behind the façade of a harmless pathetic terminally ill, shabby cockney - a caricature of a downtrodden wasted life.

Why do I say caricature?

 Listen to his pronunciation? An untrained ear will hear London Estuary (think Billy, Lestrade) - but someone fascinated with dialects will hear it fade into Cockney - why is that important? It isn't really spoken any longer in that Eliza Doolittle ridiculous form. But it is the accent of servitude and stupidity. It is part of his mask. His armor, if you will. It makes people underestimate him.

If you have SH's full attention - do you think you can beat him?

 No - let him crush you - let him beat you and as he basks in his own glory - you use his own ego against him.

You offer him another game. Basically here is the hook

\--You have already won you brilliant man and I accept my obvious defeat - but because you have crushed what was left of my little pathetic life - how would you like to finish the job by proving that I was never in your league - just for fun, so I won't die of my delusions.

 

"Before you go. Did you figure it out?"

 

Sherlock's pride could not let him admit that - no - it is a 50/50 chance and I don't play mind games as well as you do. Because it IS a mind game. Jefferson Hope has played from moment one to disarm his prey by every means possible.

 

Only as Sherlock walks away dose he actually put on his "Best game"

 

Just for fun - so I can praise you more- show me which one you picked.  (In car sales it is called, ‘name the puppy’ – in home sales – it is let them mentally decide where the furniture goes – In murdering killer cab drivers  - it is pick your poison)

 

OH INTERESTING -- now he has Sherlock hooked. He has proven what Sherlock's weakness is 3 times.

His curiosity is the weapon. The price is betting your life.  Can you beat me?

Why is that important? Sherlock has his armor down now - there are no stakes - no puzzle to solve. This is just for amusement.

If Sherlock had picked the good pill - Hope would have simply bowed to Sherlock's superior intellect and scurried off - Did you see adultery guy pressed up against the window twitching - This pill is not an easy death - it is probably pretty horrible - most poisons are excruciating - Hope has watched these deaths and hell the aneurism would be a much better time of it. Hope would not have played so hard if he didn't see victory in his grasp.

 

So he gets him to pick a pill to see if there is any way to save the game - and now you think he is blathering on?

(it has to have been cut for time but the cabbie is NOT blathering on. He is IN Sherlock's head - playing on his flaws. Hypnotizing him with the ultimate GAME!  He is Hannibal Lector and yes – this sort of manipulation can be done.  Everyone has an ego and every ego can be influenced if the secrets can be seen.  )

We learned so much about Sherlock’s secrets in the blathering on portion of the episode.

What do you have to lose-they all hate you anyway?

 They don't get you - you and I are above them.

 No more risk than you take with drugs.

 This is more fun - play with me - put your most prized possession to the test - If I am really smarter than you - would life be worth living?   What would be the point of Sherlock Holmes if he can’t beat a stupid cabbie. 

I beat boring people - are you one of them? We both have nothing to lose - let’s do things our way - more fun.

Sherlock is going to swallow that pill as sure as the Queen wears hats!

John murdered him to keep Sherlock from falling for ideas(doesn't know it in that second though) - It was no more noble than him shooting a drug dealer - risk is their drug - dancing with death is one of Sherlock's.

Wrong Pill.

 

** Two **

There is a thing called the grass is greener.   Whatever you have is never as good as your neighbor.

Two pills on the table basic math – 50/50 chance.

Push one away from you – offering it to the other person. They will take your pill about 80% of the time. 

Try it. Cut two pieces of cake.  Offer the largest one to your friend but explain to them that one piece was dropped on the floor and the other piece wasn’t.  They get to choose. 

8 times out of 10 you will get the bigger piece of cake.

You do have to factor in heathens - They don’t care about floor cooties – they didn’t wash their hands after using the loo and they scratch things in public that should not be scratched.  These people will always go for the bigger piece and think you are the idiot. 

Sherlock picked the pill by the cabbie – just like most people will do.

 (I will push the cake back to you and go cut a new piece as I tell you that you are an idiot and I would have tried to get the cabbie to tell me which pill it was, but get him to take them both because I would let him be the last victim rather than embarrassing his children – Dad doesn’t die a monster.)  

 Not good?

 

** Three **

Sherlock is also suicidal in the first episode. (Not to mention the special)

He doesn’t really care if he lives or dies. Is it a bluff – double bluff or triple bluff.   Sherlock has no idea which pill it was – he tells us that just before he stomps on the dying cabbie.    He drops the question because he read it on his face.  Throws the pill in frustration – so nobody will ever know.

If Sherlock thought he’d won – he would have kept it to have it tested.   To show off .  He would not have thrown it – mixing them up. 

 

** Four **

One of Moffat’s favorite movies is “Princess Bride” – both pills are poison and the cabbie has an antidote. He just likes screwing with people.  Both pills were the wrong pill.

 

 **Five –** but this one is a bit dodgy so it doesn’t count.

There was a special pill for Sherlock Holmes because he was the target.  Sherlock nearly got him caught the first time he killed as just a wee laddie.

 He was not on Moriarty’s  lurve radar yet except as an annoyance – the cabbie is playing fair but who supplies the pills?

His sponsor.

Cabbie gets paid when Sherlock is dead.   Except that leaves a witness.  Killem all – both pills are poison. 

 

 **Six** – kidnapping.

Neither pill is a killer – they both will knock the one who swallows it out. Moriarty kidnaps Sherlock – easy peasy and kills the cabbie – who now just looks like suicide number 5 – case goes unsolved and  Nobody even notices Sherlock is gone for weeks and they just think he’s off being a junky.

Moriarty keeps Sherlock naked and shackled by his throne……………..Jimmy the Hutt style.

 

Did you just make some Cumberkinky images in your mind bastion?

What? It’s just as plausible as….

 

 

 

We all know Sherlock and John have at some point shared a bed – not just alluded to in HOB but there is a canon reference in Valley of Fear.  Let me explain that a double-bedded room is not the same as a double room.  This particular term should be noted when traveling and booking accommodations particularly in less urban parts of Europe.  Double-bedded refers to a single bed large enough to accommodate two people – so anything from wider than a single to kingly size.  

 

**Knowing that, let’s just bask in the smirkable plot bunnies thus inferred by the following passages.**

 

 

_It was late that night when Holmes returned from his solitary excursion. We slept in a double-bedded room, which was the best that the little country inn could do for us. I was already asleep when I was partly awakened by his entrance._

_"Well, Holmes," I murmured, "have you found anything out?"_

_He stood beside me in silence, his candle in his hand. Then the tall, lean figure inclined towards me. "I say, Watson," he whispered, "would you be afraid to sleep in the same room with a lunatic, a man with softening of the brain, an idiot whose mind has lost its grip?"_

_"Not in the least," I answered in astonishment._

_"Ah, that's lucky," he said, and not another word would he utter that night._

 

Shall we also establish what Holmes believes to be true of love?  (not the same as his view of women!)

**“There is nothing more deceptive than an obvious fact.”**

**― Arthur Conan Doyle, The Boscombe Valley Mystery**

 

**“A man always finds it hard to realize that he may have finally lost a woman's love, however badly he may have treated her.”**

**― Arthur Conan Doyle, The Musgrave Ritual**

 

**“Detection is, or ought to be, an exact science, and should be treated in the same cold and unemotional manner. You have attempted to tinge it with romanticism, which produces much the same effect as if you worked a love story or an elopement into the fifth proposition of Euclid.” – _The Sign of Four_**

**“He was, I take it, the most perfect reasoning and observing machine that the world has seen, but as a lover he would have placed himself in a false position. He never spoke of the softer passions, save with a gibe and a sneer. They were admirable things for the observer- excellent for drawing the veil from men's motives and actions. But for the trained observer to admit such intrusions into his own delicate and finely adjusted temperament was to introduce a distracting factor which might throw a doubt upon all his mental results. Grit in a sensitive instrument, or a crack in one of his own high-power lenses, would not be more disturbing than a strong emotion in a nature such as his.”**

**― Arthur Conan Doyle, The Complete Sherlock Holmes**

** This is all I have to say about how Watson feels about Holmes…. **

**“I have always held, too, that pistol practice should be distinctly an open-air pastime; and when Homes, in one of his queer humours, would sit in an armchair with his hair-trigger and a hundred Boxer cartridges and proceed to adorn the opposite wall with a patriotic V.R. done in bullet pocks, I felt strongly that neither the atmosphere nor the appearance of our room was improved by it.”**

**― Arthur Conan Doyle, The Memoirs of Sherlock Holmes**

**He put up with THIS!** (See even the smiley face is just a twist on canon – LOL)

 

 

 

**You may remember the old Persian saying, ‘There is danger for him who taketh the tiger cub, and danger also for whoso snatches a delusion from a woman.’ – A Case of Identity**

 

 

 

 

 

The plot holes in this series are not new – We all technically know that Reichenbach doesn’t work.  We know that a tight belt won’t kill the pain of being stabbed.  We know that Mary shooting Sherlock is stupid.  We know Johnlock is real – well, some of us do.  Hehe.  We know Moriarty is dead.  We know there is a lot of time gaps that drive us all Mad. 

This is why they are there.

_**“It has always seemed to me that so long as you produce your dramatic effect, accuracy of detail matters little. I have never striven for it and I have made some bad mistakes in consequence. What matter if I hold my readers?”** _

_**― Arthur Conan Doyle** _

 

See – the important part is – did you like the story?

You can either read Sherlock Holmes, or you can be Sherlock Holmes.

This is their magic.

 If you are a Watson, they will make you more logical.  If you are a Sherlock, they will twist you and give you puzzles and red herrings and teach you how to be human enough to see that every puzzle has an answer but it doesn’t actually need one.    There is a balance to logic and love. 

 

In other words, you have to become more human to love the spaces and the mysteries as much as the solutions.

For Sherlock his mind is 93% logic, but it takes that seven-perccent solution – a drug – a chemical defect – to find the clarity of his mind.

 

 

There will be more – If you are still following my rambles – my deepest condolences on your fascination with barmy people.   All comments adored. 


	6. Series 4 on cheating hearts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I have heard " it was just texting" a few times now...and this is why it maybe was not JUST texting.
> 
> John is a cheater.

Series 4...and here we go...

 

So...the John I predicted came true...

I apologise 

 

This ramble is about Why John cheating is perfectly within his character's parameter.  

 

 

 

So...we have some very angry people out there who discovered their cuddly kitten has claws.  

 

But... It was ONLY texting!!!!

 

I beg to differ if you care to follow along...

 

Our first suggestion that John had a certain inclination to cheat was during the mayfly man.  He made the suggestion that Sherlock was missing the obvious.   

 

"He's a man."

 

All he needed to say.

 

Why would John do that?

 

Let us look at where he was at the time.  New Father and exhausted all the time.  It is not just Mums...it wears on Dad too.   

 

Mary and Sherlock had evidently been doing some running around without John.  They had a secret spy lair and candles and some kind of bed looking thing.

 

Do we really think John is too stupid to note that his wife and his best friend seem to disappear at the same time?   He has learned a lot from Sherlock and a simple tail is really not rocket science.   

 

So...if he knows for sure or not, what must be going through his head.  No matter how much he trusts them...he would still feel left out.

 

We get a glimpse of this with the Toby scene.  Of course she is better than you.

 

 

Replaced.  Not just by one of them either.  Suddenly, John is standing on the outside looking in.

 

They are having fun while he slips into the mundane.  They let him play sometimes...because he is a loyal faithful dogsbody.  

 

The man who once could see him...the one who fixed him...just by noticing that he was not invisible and useless...has now relegated him to the role of pet.  Mary too.

 

He went from the center of both Mary and Sherlock's attention to...invisible again.  

 

He sees a woman on the bus.  She notices him.  Flower in the hair caught her attention, but she sees him.  

 

He meant to throw the number away...but

 

What does John need most?  Danger.

 

What can you possibly imagine that could be more dangerous than cheating on an assassin when HER New Best friend sees through everyone and everything. 

 

Even if they kill him for it, at least they will bloody notice him.

 

Just texting...

 

Okay, he did say that and it redeems him a little.   Unless you see what your eyes saw.

 

He had just texted Redhair that he was not free and this would not end well.

 

What happened next?

 

She was there.  We do not see how that ends.

 

Except...then Mary runs away.  

 

Of course he is going to be furious.  

 

On the plane...they sit apart and he dreams of the woman in the glass.

 

That is very important because his memory of her is wearing a third outfit.  One we have never seen.  One John has never seen if he is telling the truth.

 

 

 

The thing about cheaters when they are Narcissistic is they want you to know how clever they are...even if circumstances make them regret...they are testing you.

 

John confessing is an impulse.  Ha...you don't know me.

 

My experience on both sides of this situation is that even if the cheater confesses to a part...that does not mean they are not still only telling a partial truth.

 

Think of the child who blames the dog for eating the cookies.  Even if he confesses that he ate one too.  He will never tell you that he fed the cookies to the dog.  Technically the dog ate cookies so he has confessed.  30 years later...you will hear how he pulled the wool over your eyes all those years.   

 

Similar mentality to a cheater.

 

It was just texting.

 

Then you find something that puts a plot hole in the story and the story will adjust just far enough to encompass the new fact.  

 

Play their game. Do not lay out the evidence.  Keep some back and watch the cheater dance.   

 

John left out facts.  He also texts Molly, Lestrade and Sherlock.  Was that cheating too?

 

Of course not.  

 

There has to be more.  You have a theory that fits some of the facts.  Mine fits the facts we saw but were not Told as well.  

 

Another minor solar system is that even with all the guilt...he still wants more.

 

The therapist  asks a particular question.   "Did he wake up alone?"

 

We saw a woman's head.  We know he was drinking heavily.  

 

Are we sure that head in his bed was ghost Mary?   

 

Prove it.

 

You cannot.  We have his word and he lies.   

 

So, knowing Eurus, did she need to ask the question?

 

Death does strange things to people.  Sometimes they have an inappropriate shag.  

 

I think she already knew the answer and that was why she played innocent and said she meant Rosie.    

 

We do not have a timeline between Mary's death and when John was shot.  She said he was doing better...but that is no guarantee that the hug fixed him at once.  This could be several sessions from that hug because she knew a lot for someone who had one session interrupted.   

 

She even says...going on and on for hours and hours.  Sounds like more than one.   He had even brought up what he said about a secret brother.  And he did catch her error...but not instantly.  

He said that she had met Sherlock one time...not that she and John had only had one visit.   

 

If he has been dating Eurus and it only takes 5 minutes for her to ruin a mind, it could easily be that she ramped up John's anger and desire to kill Sherlock.

 

It is a possible get out of jail free card for beating Sherlock until the Serial Killers Minions stopped him from kicking Sherlock to Death!  And for knowing Sherlock was about to be murdered...and just going to say goodbye and walking away.

 

 

Will explore that more later.

 

 

 


	7. Did Jawn try to kill Sherlock?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We have to look at the most logical motives for the chain of events as shown. Not what we just like to believe about John. I am very sorry.

Did Jawn try to kill Sherlock?

 

Oh, this is going to piss some people off...other people may say that I have finally said what they were thinking.

 

The short version?  Yes.  John tried to kill Sherlock.

 

That will not go down well and proving an intention is usually much harder.  In this case we have several things that point in that direction.  

 

So before any debate on Mr. Cuddles, let us look at T6T and the chain of events.

 

John blames Sherlock for Mary's death.

 

John writes a letter that breaks Sherlock's heart.  We don't get to see it all, but Molly gives us the main point.

 

Anyone but you.  

 

Think about that...

Does not just include Molly and Lestrade and all the lovely people.  He would let Sally...or Mycroft....a criminal...a stranger help him before Sherlock.   John does not want to ever see him again.  

 

What does Sherlock do?

He goes to John's therapist for advice.  He is THAT desperate.   

 

He hides in his flat and drugs himself to oblivion. John does not come. 

 

He does not even hide it.  The kitchen meth lab is just waiting For John to come and save him.   

 

 

 John does not come.  (Which of course also leads you to wonder how Sherlock planted a recording device in John's cane, having not left the flat or spoken to John for weeks...grrr...stopit show)

 

It takes Mrs. Hudson and Mycroft to get John to even speak to Sherlock and he won't even examine him.  No...he calls Molly.  

 

So...now we know that Sherlock is killing himself, on purpose, hoping John will save him.  John does say a snide and disgusted, "In need of another hit, are you?"

 

John does not care. Compare that with...

 

"You could have called me if you were anywhere near this."

 

Or

 

"This could kill you, Sherlock.  You could die!"

 

John stands outside the door of the men's room chatting with a nurse as his best friend shoots up.  

He does not give a damned about anything a doctor should...just a doctor!

Does he have clean needles?

What substance is he using?

What dose is he administering?

What is his heart doing as he shoots up 3 feet from his best friend...have a listen johnny boy....

 

 

Sherlock could not have been more plain that his plan was to die.  He was jolly about it.  John is confused but...he hears that is the outcome intended and he just lets him stroll into the loo and does not even bother to question him in case Sherlock's eyes roll back and white foam comes out his nose as he aspirates. 

 

John is already on shaky ground as a friend at this point.  

 

Then a chain of events makes the ax fall.

 

John hears Culverton say the morgue is his favorite room.  John is horrified that Smith is fiddling with a dead person as a puppet.

 

John has every right to question Sherlock's mental capacity.  He has every right to disarm him.

 

He kicks him.  Repeatedly.

 

First, as an honourable man...one does not kick your opponent when down. That is Thug behavior...not the behavior of a person who is trained and skilled in combat.  

 

Second, as a Doctor.  John knows he is doing easily fatal damage.

 

He knows ribs break.

He knows organs rupture.

He knows Sherlock is one year out from having a thoracic GSW.  

He knows Sherlock has not lifted a finger to protect himself.

 

He kicks him until the serial killers minions pull him away...and stands there wanting to continue.   

 

Sherlock is put in hospital.

John is brought in for questioning.

 

John justifies his behavior by breaking the security protocols mycroft set in place.  He told Lestrade that Sherlock shot Charles Augustus in the face and we have all known he was going to do that.  

But it was fun

 

(That is sort of a great line...but very telling. )

 

Then we see a broadcast.  

John sees it.  He reacts to it and he knows exactly what it means.

 

John did not share the information with Lestrade.     Remember the security guy is to keep Sherlock IN because of his escape history.  

 

John chooses to leave.  Goes all the way home.  Thinks about how Sherlock is about to get murdered.  

What does he decide?

To protect his Sherlock of course...

Wait....nope...

 

John Watson walks into that hospital to say goodbye.   

 

Goodbye.

 

 

Sherlock is unconscious and John makes sure that he leaves that cane so even if Sherlock does wake up...he will see that cane and what?   Give up?  Want to die more? Remember what he has lost?   

 

John knows Sherlock is helpless.  He helped make him that way.  And he leaves him to his fate.  

 

He goes to Baker Street...but that is really not John wanting to be helpful.

If he wanted to be helpful, he would have TOLD Mycroft or Lestrade that Culverton was about to put Sherlock in the morgue!

 

So if helping was not his motive...what was?

 

Alibi ?

 

Sorry, but it is possible.  If John is with Mycroft as Sherlock is murdered...he cannot be held responsible,can he?

 

This chain of events does not say much for John.

 

He left his suicidal, unconscious "best friend" in the care of a possible serial killer after the man threatened his friends life on national television!

 

(If you think that is the greatest friendship ever kind of thing...stay away from me!)

 

 

That does not mean that John is not redeemable.  

 

From John's side of it.

 

Sherlock has finally driven me insane.  He let Mary die and now I see her and I am afraid for people to know.  

He is throwing the life she gave him away.  There is nothing I can do.  It is inevitable that Sherlock is going to die on me again.  If I am close to it this time (and already clinically insane) his 3rd and final death is going to end me.

 

At least if I let him die like this, he dies on a case.  He dies as Sherlock Holmes. The death of a hero.   

 

At least if he is murdered, he does not die a forgotten junkie in his own filth under a bridge for the rats to chew on first.   

 

Maybe John could survive one kind of death over the other ?  Maybe it was all he could see that he could do to let Sherlock go with some dignity??

 

He did not try to save him at all.

 

Until he saw the tape and realised the whole thing was set up by Mary.  That is when John sprung into action...on the phone with Lestrade while driving.   

 

But, even then, he said something does not feel right.  He still did not explain that comment on the telly.   

 

I know many of you will hate this chapter of Meta and will have to say...

 

John did not know or that John lost faith because Sherlock was acting crazy.

 

If Sherlock had not proved to John his mind was not gone in the first place...that would work. 

 

But John did know and he even deduced how Sherlock did it through ghost Mary.   So to say he saw no evidence that Sherlock was right...just is not accurate.  John saw the TD12 bags still hanging on the poles....because...you know...contaminated medical supplies just hanging around inside a hospital is such a done thing....eww...no it is not.   But...still...he saw that and Smith explained flat out that he liked to confess things but did not want his staff to remember.  What else would he confess too?   Murder...seems a likely candidate for the list.   

 

So, I love the sweet hug....but John had done a lot more to cry about than just cheat on Mary.   

 

Til next time.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	8. #Reichencrack 2017

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In reference to the Reichencrack challenge, this is all true and guaranteed to blow your mind with tin deerstalker hats to wear to hide the sticky bits of brain matter.

April fools Reichencrack

 

Sherlock never jumped from the building...we saw Jim fall.

 

John had been dosed with H.O.U.N.D. and saw what he expected to see...which was a man in a billowy coat kill himself.   Sherlock had actually killed Jim.  Shot him in the face then threw him off the building and ran down the stairs really fast and laid down on the pavement.   John had gotten knocked over by the bike and believed what he saw was real.

 

The guy at Mrs.Hudsons with the gun was the one who squirted John in the face with the drug.

 We saw the squirt gun in his tool box.

So Sherlock leaves not to destroy Moriarty's network....but to take command.  But he is terrible at it and cannot remember to pay people so they quit.

 

Sherlock gets so depressed that he enters a sex shop specializing in BDSM and that is what Mycroft actually 'rescued' him from...not a bad arse terrorist network in Serbia.  

 

So, this is proved by the fact that Sherlock was told his Holiday was over by his brother.  We are also given a hint that this was a sex den by the fact that Sherlock accused his brother of enjoying watching him be tortured.  

Sherlock did not need Janine to explain the handcuff remark because he is not a virgin by a long shot.

 

Uncle Rudy is still alive and he is the one who let Eurus out of her cage long ago and together they now rule Moriarty's old network.

 

The lady we saw is not Eurus...because Eurus is in London and is helping Julian Assange expose the evil corruption of the world so Uncle Rudy can have more customers.   

 

They were in league with getting rid of the pay to play US government and have dosed the entire Democratic party with Hound so that the idiots will believe the news they hear.

 

That is why Charles Magnusson had to die ...because He was not showing the Idiocracy documentary often enough and people still thought news mattered.

 

Eurus also fought against Mycroft on Brexit and Nigel and she are in a covert relationship.   

 

She has not killed him yet because she is waiting to feed him to her cannibals.

 

Sherrinford Island is no longer her prison but is her luxury villain lair and the bits we saw are just for show.

 

Most of The Final Problem did not actually happen but she has taken over sections of Baskerville and gained their mind control technology.   There was no patience bomb because she just used a mind control beam and the explosion was a metaphor for the boys losing their minds in a three way orgy that she was controlling with the drone mind beam.

 

I that am lost oh who will find me

 

Deep down below

The old beech tree

 

Help suck or em now

The east wind blow job

 

Sexteen by sex brother

And down you go.

 

 

See That is what the song really meant.

 

Oh and Moriarty is not dead....no.

Turns out her mind beam can even fix death.  Jim has a really bad headache at times but he just pretends he is a clock or a Choochoo train and he is better...despite having to do a bit of a comb over now.   

 

So when Eurus found out that Mary killed her brother and he was dead on the table...It was her life restoring mind beam that brought Sherlock back to life.  Not gay Jawn love...they are just friends except for when the mind beam forces them to have Platonic sex.  

 

Eurus killed Mary on purpose.  Eurus was, of course, also Mrs. Norbury and she really did surprise Sherlock by shooting the rival for John's love. In fact, Eurus is now all future female characters on the Show, except for Mrs. Hudson and Molly. Every woman John dates will always be Eurus.

 

That was why she became John's therapist was mostly to get him over his nohomo hump and get her brother some sexy times with his true love.  Because she loves her mind beam, but seriously..she cannot do all the work forever, John.

 

She realised Watson was a lying cheating idiot and counted on Sherlock seeing it too...

She assumed Sherlock would shoot him and save his brother after John had left him to die on the morgue floor.   But then he tried to pull one over on her.

 

 

That was why she lapped into catatonia after the fake plane was revealed.   She realised that she had put the lives of all those people at risk just for two goldfish.

 

 

It was not a fake plane it crashed and that annoying kid was the only casualty...the sleeping people all fell on her and she was crushed but saved all those lives with her cushy curls. 

 

Eurus the fake one who lives in a glass box really does like playing violin with her not real brother.

 

The real Eurus is searching for their secret half brother Henry James Sherrinford Moran.   But he is called Tiger or Kernel and he is a traveling Gypsy auctioneer.  

 

Tigers cannot change their stripes and she knows that he exists because she deduced that Father was having an affair when she was 6 because of the

Parrot dander on his cuff.

She only knows the Mother

Is a Lady Pirate.

 

 

So series five spoilers are simply that Eurus will get tired of waiting for John to roger her brother and she will shoot him again in the leg this time and that way he can say he walks funny because of something not to do with his....uhem Head...( big one or smaller enormous one.)

 

The shooting also makes Jawn easier to catch so that Sherlock may have his way with John more regularly.

 

There will be no cases in Series 5...just an extended sex Holiday and some Mycroft and Lestrade drama.  

 

 

The end.   And April Fools.     

 


	9. The Problematic Well

The problematic well.

Everyone complains about the well scene, but they complain about it for the wrong reasons.

John is chained to the bottom of a well and water is pumped into it, filling up the well to drown him. Then a rope is sent down and he is magically rescued.

I personally was screaming long before the removable hobbit feet debate came into play.

Sure... rescuers may have shown up in time before John died of hypothermia and unchained him and maybe the rope was just there for him to grab onto. ( of course anyone who has ever had hypothermia knows the very first sign is exhaustion and the weird sensation of your hands refusing to open and close any longer so a rope is useless to you if it is not tied on you... by someone else). Having gold panned in really cold Colorado streams and fallen in the ocean in Maine at Christmas time, I also know that some of us can go a really long time before the effects begin. I am fine in cold water far longer than many people and it is different for each individual. But, let's just say all that is solved and the water was nice and toasty.

The real issues are that that is not how wells work, at all!

First of all let's look at well construction. What was the chain chained to? ( The bottom of the well?)

What is the bottom of a well made from?

Aggregate (some type of pebbles) or crushed stone (which is gravel), so what exactly could they have attached to his shackles at the bottom of that well? The point of a well is to let water seep in so a concrete bottom with a rusty iron bolt in the middle is not a well!

That does not mean it was not some forgotten hole to punish slaves and servants (Which were pretty much the same thing once upon a time... we do forget that slavery in England ended only thirty years ahead of the States.)

But, that exception aside, as this was identified as a well, we must take exception to how a simple internet search could provide the basic details of well construction.

Most viewers seem unaware of how wells work.

They are thinking they are rock lined tubes that hold water, such as a drinking glass. If you add water the well fills up. But that is nothing like how a well works.

Think of it like this.

When you put a straw in a glass of water what happens? The water level of the straw matches the water level in the glass. To obtain a drink from it, you create suction and what happens? Does the water level in the straw stay full after you finish creating suction? No, it returns to the level of the surface of the water.

A well works on the same principal. Except, put your straw in a washtub of water and consider the big tub to be similar to what is called the underground aquifer. A fancy word for underground tub of water.

So in old wells ( and still to this day in some places). You dig a hole and keep digging until you (get your straw below the water table) hit water and cannot dig deeper because the water table is making you have to hold your breath to keep going. ( That is why wells were dug in the dry season so you would know where the water table is at the lowest point).

Despite what you saw happen to John in the show, where the water table was, is as deep as the well can get. (What happens to the water when you let go of the straw... the liquid in the straw drains right back to match the level in the glass)

You can draw water from the well and the well will return to the same level after a short time. Well output is measured in this fashion and you can either dig a well a bit deeper or wider if the output does not keep up with your needs. But the well will only hold water at the same level as the ground water. You can try this by dripping water down a straw ... you cannot Fill Up the straw.

You cannot Fill Up a well.

Pumping water Into a well may raise the level slightly but it will continue to return to the level of the groundwater even if you could pump enough volume in to fill it. Filling a well is a losing battle and you basically have to fill up the whole aquifer to change the level of a well. Think of taking a garden hose to a pond... how much water will it take to raise the level one inch.

For those of us questioning the well scene, and those of you condescendingly saying, well obviously Sherlock got the water shut off and used the rope to climb down and snuggle his Watson, picked the lock and heroically saved the day... you do not understand the question!

That is not how wells work!

 

Also, consider, Where did this great reserve of water to pump in the well come from?  Another well?  

Who puts a rusty chain in a well? Because that is going to affect the water quality. Who does not notice a corpse rotting even in an abandoned well? ( Ever own a property with an old well and a small creature falls in it... drowns and begins the delightful process of decomposing, I promise you, even a house fire will not cover up that smell. ).

So how was the body of a small child never found?

When nerds watch a show, we do have to assume the writers have a basic understanding of physics and that is simply not the case in this scene.

I can get over all the other plot holes in this particular scene too, but not the simple fact that you can never fill a well.

That brings me to a few other small details that are problematic just in this one scene.

John was unconscious in a couple of feet of cold water. In the first place, what kept him upright enough not to tumble over and drown in just a few feet of water. (How many celebs drown in their bathtub from going to sleep while overusing a simple prescription?). No matter how carefully he was placed, unconscious in water is a recipe for disaster. He will shiver and fall over and is unconscious so he will drown. Watson was dead by the time Sherlock woke up would not have been nearly as fun of a story but that is the common sense reality of the situation we were shown.

My next issue is that hypothermia began when he was first placed in the water, not when the well filled up and he awoke. We have no timeline other than Sherlock saying they had been out for hours!

Groundwater temperature varies with depth and is a function of the background geothermal gradient and ambient temperature at the land surface. The average temperature of groundwater in the upper parts of aquifers is around 10-11º C in England. We know this is some point after Sherlock's birthday and so we can assume that it is winterish weather.

If you are in water that temperature you have approximately 30 minutes before you lose consciousness. It will take far less than that before your coordination is affected. The charts say it can begin five minutes into submersion. So here was John sat unconscious in cold water " been out for hours" and yet he woke right up?

No. No no no.

http://www.seagrant.umn.edu/coastal_communities/hypothermia

  
https://useakayak.org/references/hypothermia_table.html

John would simply not have awakened or if he did, he would have already been so groggy he could not have moved. He may have been irrational or even fought his rescuers. Most likely he would have just stayed unconscious because sitting in cold water would cover enough body area that it would drop his core temperature. Even if he did wake up, he probably would have been too groggy to understand where he was and too exhausted and sluggish to stand up.

We also have the issue of his waterproof Bluetooth earpiece and the fact she needed some kind of wifi to use that and broadcast. Not impossible but still another thing that seemed a bit far fetched. It was great that John and Sherlock could hear each other and all but she had to predict that Sherlock would shoot Mycroft and plan the waterproof headset bit. ( Maybe that was why Mycroft was left at the prison?)

But that is another thing. Why was Mycroft left behind unharmed? Why was Sherlock not much more concerned that she may have killed him? He did not even look for Mycroft or ask his sister if he was in danger too?

Wouldn't it have played into her game much more consistently for her and her multitude of invisible minions to have transported both Mycroft and John to Musgrave hall and made Sherlock choose between saving his brother OR his friend?

Because she had just given him a choice of destroying one or the other and he chooses to destroy himself rather than Harm either of them. Fair enough Sherlock, your next test will obviously be to pick which one you wish to save the most if you only have time to save one of them.

The reasoning there is, Sherlock is unwilling to kill either of them but if he cannot save them both, which one will he rescue?

Leaving Mycroft behind, safe and sound, was a bit of an oversight considering Eurus is such a clever girl.

But, we never saw Mycroft Land on the boat as a pirate either so how he got to the island in the first place is anyone's guess.

I want the scene of Mycroft repelling onto the little fishing boat in his lovely Savile Row suit! I vote Mark Gatiss as the new James Bond as well, but you know, who is listening to me?

I know so many things from season four holes can be fixed with some simple reasoning and time constraints were such a huge factor, but by the same token, huge physical impossibility and not just wishful Johnlockers has marred this series with great discontent. They never explained the fall, and I can accept that but just because they got away with that does not mean I am going to keep enjoying them writing themselves into a corner and leaping the wall and ignoring it.

We cannot jump out of exploding windows and not be scratched up a bit. We cannot shoot people with that much security in the face and get off free. We cannot sit for hours at the bottom of a well and wake up fit and roaring to climb.

Mad geniuses do not conveniently go catatonic just because their bubbas finally hug them. They escape and keep doing more mad heinous genius things ... they do not kill themselves on top of buildings when they want you to jump too... they push your arse off the building and wave as you fall... then post the video on YouTube.

I adore the show, but I am also willing to point out things that I found just not believable to the point it was comic in places there should not have been comedy.

I absolutely adored the foreshadowing of water but the problem with it was, Sherlock was foreshadowing something nobody supposedly knew. Drowned Redbeard? Why was it the smallest person in the houses Job to find Victor Trevor? Mycroft was older and smarter and heard the Musgrave ritual song as well? And if the kid Says Drowned then... what did they think were obvious places to look for the body.

Foreshadowing the Aquarium does not make a great deal of sense because he only figured out it was the old lady a few minutes before the aquarium scene. Then he is told she can be found there.

So give me something that is Sherlock in deep water... sure to die. No way out. Accepting and boom John saves him. Not this mishmash of metaphors that just do not ping my chills button.

We had all this fire and water metaphor. Blue Djinn fire that swallowed Mary's casket. Blue water and another pool with a fight, the aquarium and the well... yet all of that was random and not predictable things to foreshadow.

But if Eurus is in the sky unable to land and Sherlock is in deep water and drowning... then what is Mycroft? John and Mary were fire metaphors. The only thing left is earth or wood depending on the type of philosophy they are speaking, now that Mary is spirit.

Eurus could have buried Mycroft alive or something and the only way to save John and not put out his fire was to let Mycroft be crushed or something equally scary.  
Some sort of duality as in the other games.

I would have loved to see Sherlock back in his proper place, able to outthink everyone, use that predictive ability he displayed in Reichenbach and the Therapist scene and the Culverton Smith hospital scene to use the fact that Wells do not fill up so he saved Mycroft while he explained to John how to make a flotation device from his clothing then the two of them (Sherlock and Mycroft) save John!

It could have linked to the Cluedo comment that he was able to save his friend And his brother because 'the rules are wrong' and Sherlock is still our unique genius rather than always wrong in some way and the slow kid in the family.

 

Then Mycroft saves Eurus after having caged her for so many years. That would have had me cheering.

Anyway, that is my thoughts on the Well scene without resorting to pointing out that John was about to be shot in the face with a ballistic gun, not a tranquilliser gun and yet we must just somehow believe that he was fine and went to Mycroft's to play scary clown games, was blown out a window and hours later hit with more tranquilliser, again fine, then hit with more and put in a well and again ( do they know that it has a cumulative effect when administered repeatedly?) it had some antifreeze magic so he did not die.

Right. How silly of us to have imagined This was John's Mind Hobbit hole when clearly this all made complete rational sense just as it was.

Except, that is not how wells work.

Thanks for reading. What do you think of the well scene? Pass or fail? Did you get put off by the chained feet or did you just accept it as shown?


	10. Prison Blues

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Askabanford, Sherrinford, the prison discussion may not mean what you think it means.

Prison blues.

Or reasons Other Than Johnlock that we assumed we were getting an extra episode!

They have spent a good deal of time laughing at those of us who said.. there MUST be an extra surprise special. They hooked it into being ONLY disappointed Johnlock tin hats who thought there must be a kissing episode.

  
I am here to tell you that I adore the idea of Johnlock but I equally adore Sherlolly! Yes. I also ship Adlock and Sherstrade and Mylock and Sherarty and for some odd reason the thought of Jolly (John and Molly) just makes me grin. I ship about everything but... somehow... because I thought the bizarre Final Problem had to be "Not the end" I became one of the screaming people demanding Johnlock.

Hey...I am admitting that watching Martin Freeman kiss Benedict Cumberbatch in any movie or any setting is up there on my wish list.. they are pretty and it would be hot... but that happening or not happening has very little to do with the stuff I was dis-chuffed about in series four. Now I know there are great lists of things that were weird in this series. I agree with most of them but some that really bothered me have not made any other meta lists I have seen.

So, let us just talk for a bit about a place that centred around the final problem. In series 4 we find out that the secret sister lives in a prison specifically built for the uncontainable. Jolly until you remember that little speech from Mycroft.

"We have no prison that could contain him without causing a riot on a daily basis"

Wellllll, you apparently do?

Sherlock killed Magnussen and Mycroft sent him to die rather than put him in the same facility that he has housed his sister in for years. (Because in three it must have just slipped Mycroft's mind as well as Elizabeth Alisha and Sir Edwin? ).

We have this mysterious sister that Mycroft visits on some sort of regular basis and he gives her Christmas Treats... but ON Christmas Day when little bro has a pew-pew malfunction... He cannot remember Sherrinford exists. Though he just mentioned .. his sister!

So magically we have the broadcast of Jimmy asking if the world missed him and it saves Sherlock. But here is the thing.. Mycroft was not shocked. Now we have enough info to realise that Jim supposedly recorded all these little blips for Eurus. Okay.

For an international criminal Jim had a lot of time on his hands... didn't he? I mean think about it, is he jet setting from exotic holiday spots or yachting or playing golf on pebble beach... as he can obviously afford to do? He seems to have a slight shoe obsession, yes, but he has a great deal of time and resources to waste on a junkie with a hobby.

And as much as we adore Sherlock... in real life he is mostly unemployable. He is a drugs user, has overdosed more than once, has a criminal record, cannot get on with anyone, pickpocketing and breaking and entering are his most notable skills other than body part theft and bio-hazard waste in his fridge. Can you imagine spraying his kitchen with luminol?

If Jim wanted to get him out of the way... he could have just planted a body with Sherlock's DNA all over it and let the system torture he and Mycroft for ages. For a fixer, he isn't very good at it.

Jim is at Mycroft's beck and call and Eurus's beck and call, all whilst obsessing over one little detective bloke. Didn't he have any criminal things to do? He was supposed to be one of the sort of people they put in Sherrinford but we are to believe that he gets to just visit a place that is so secret even Mycroft forgets it exists sometimes?

Also, wasn't it cool how they jumped on the boat as pirates? Yeah that was hilarious--

What did you miss there?

Mycroft was not with them on the boat.

They were tracking a boat that was too close to the island and about to crash... but in the next scene they have had time to tie people up, write in the sand leaving no footprints, don 5 hours worth of stage makeup, drag sailors on the beach and change clothes?

Funny how the radar tracked the boats but missed the bloody Helicopter!

Where did the guards have to come from that they were so slow?   
And remember these three idiots JUST blew up and they are moving faster than all the guards.

So... Mycroft is the Guv's superior. He has to stand there and take it when Mycroft tells him "it used to be Your office." Why did they sneak in?

Why did they go with zero backup?

Why did they not just ride the helo out and land like normal big-wigs and have Anthea stay in the whirlybird IN CASE their worst fear was realised? She could have sent the Calvary the first moment?

Why did they play?

We believed the girl on the plane because we had visual and it still did not make sense that post 9/11 someone had not noticed a commercial airliner not responding to safety checks when it just kept flying? It would have had a military escort of some sort very quickly... yes even over the ocean. Auto-pilot is great but there are a lot of planes in the sky and there are so many protocols that that was wearing thin very quickly.

Why did the Guv go along with being put in a cell if he was on her side?

Why did Mycroft not see through the subterfuge quickly? The clues were there. "If you want my help, I need your name so I can find your plane. Where does Nana live? What did you do at Nana's house? You saw a play? Oh, in New York or London? " Finding her, if she was real,should not have been an impossibility for two deductive dynamos. They were at Sherrinford in the day... The plane was in the dark. She could not really have still been flying in the dark over water hours later if she were heading to London... (though other cities have big wheels like the London eye as well) not over water the whole time. She had to be flying west to still be in the dark when they were gone from day to dark. That is probably what finally clued Sherlock into his sisters game.

Why did they not ask the "Right " questions?

Don't get me wrong, loved the idea of Askabanford but the implementation simply did not fly.

How did they get off the boat? The prison was alerted to their arrival so sneaking in was not the plan. It was hilarious... but it did not make any sense whatsoever.

So, we are at this fortress, have unnecessarily put ourselves at their total mercy and ... how did they expect that to play out?

Then we have a flash of Sir Edwin (the bottom third of the door handle that IS the British Government) speaking to Sherrinford on the phone saying they do not even know if Mycroft Holmes will live?

Either we are seeing someone's dream and they did not escape the stupid explosion... Or Sir Edwin is covering for the landing party, In which case some Measure of Backup was in place... so where were they?

It also tells us that Mycroft, having discovered that things were not to his standards could have at once communicated with his colleagues that things were pear-shaped and they needed some major help right then. If Sir Edwin can speak to the prison then it is not a communications black hole.

"Sherrinford is not secure." Boom... SAS crawling all over the place.

Here is a good one. Why did they even have to go to Sherrinford in the first place? Is Sherlock's word not good enough? Did he not believe that John got all this intimate information about his secured sister from somewhere? How many sources knew she existed... Sherlock and her own parents did not know? Who does Mycroft think John spoke to if not his actual sister? They have no need to confront her at the prison. Why would they even expect her to be there, after all, didn't she just serenade them whilst flying a drone into the flat? That says she is most likely in London and not way out on the Island of Doctor No?

Why would anyone deduce that she is bunking off back to prison? Not saying it is impossible if she had taken over the asylum, but she could have just as easily set up her experiments right there in London.

If Mycroft keeps John under level 3 surveillance then checking his CCTV and phone records would have told them he was flirting with someone. How did Mary miss it too? (Okay she was gone sometimes but she is super spy and can tell when Sherlock fibs... how did they miss boring reliable John's affair?).

No offence, again, but if Mary and Sherlock were meeting up in their secret bolt-hole spy-lair and ignoring John to that extent... maybe he had a right to cheat. (Dickish... yeah. But still, taking someone for granted and Mary and Sherlock meeting alone... not feeling like John was one of the musketeers here.).

The point is both his Therapist and the affair would have left some evidence and going to Sherrinford unprepared was amateurish.

They knew Sherrinford was not secure before they left! She blew them up and sang a song only SHE would know in her actual voice?

Combine that with the fact that John had a ballistic handgun pointed at him and the trigger pulled... going back and saying "oh it was a tranquilliser gun " (which is set up completely differently and does not look like that at all) was so funny that I wonder how anyone could think the episode was anything but a shark-jumping Dallas Dream Season?

I do get time constraints and production costs... but... they spent a bomb on special effects and glitzy Bond sets to tell a story that makes virtually no sense.

Sure there were many intense emotional scenes and wow.. love the idea of Sherlock having to pick between John and Mycroft ... that was just brilliantly done... Sherlock calling her bluff... Yummy. Noble Mycroft.. exquisite. John not even begging or saying" bu -bye, dude. " when Sherlock tucked the gun under his own chin... errrrrm... not so much on the wonderful scale.

The Molly thing just felt slapdash. Why?  
(Yeah psychopath... why not... got it)  
But, Mrs. Hudson loves him and She was not even considered? She may have been in hospital from the explosion at that exact moment... maybe she had blast lung or a heart attack... she could have been dead as they spoke and nobody thought of her once.

And a buffalo rifle? Really, John? How many buffalo rifles are there in the U.K. I actually have one passed down through the ages and THAT was not a buffalo rifle... my son thought that was the best joke of the series.

( by the way... for non-gun people ...

the Glasses wearing shooter... the scope will NOT break your glasses ... that is the purpose of the stock which is braced against your shoulder to absorb the recoil. Sorry Sherlock, he could not have made the shot as you pictured because he is too stupid to hold a gun, not because his glasses would have shattered... many of the greatest marksmen in the world wear glasses.)

I was embarrassed and wanted Mary to pop in and say, "John? Do better?"

Then our delightful Saw romp takes us to a place where they put fake grave stones? Has anyone in the history of ever Built a fake cemetery by their home as a decorative architecture feature for the kids to scamper about in? Ever thought of a swing set or a tree house? Just a suggestion.

Why leave Mycroft behind and nobody asked about him but at the first..  
"Is Mycroft with you?"   
So, why did she not make Sherlock choose which one he could save after he called the bluff on the killing one of them.

No.. the things that seemed off were not about Johnlock, but now we can barely discuss them without offending someone.

A riff came about between Shippers and it has ruined a lot of fun in this fandom. To quote John Watson, "It is all fine."

Everybody should be able to enjoy any well written story and I am thinking of one called "Single Girl's Guide to London ". It sort of pairs Sherlock with Janine and it is a scream. I even read one that paired Sherlock and Mrs. Hudson and it was done so well, that by the end the readers disbelief was suspended and it was really a good story. Anything is possible in fan fiction and that needs to be sacred. You do not have to read pairs you do not enjoy but the ship wars are just Twilight reborn and I hate it.

If you can imagine it, it is possible.

Series 4 is not the first series to have giant plot holes and issues...   
\---

How did they know Jim did not rig the vest to blow up as soon as John tried to take it off in the pool? Better, why did Jim come back... well maybe to see why there was no explosion when idiot Sherlock ripped John's defective suicide vest off in a darkened swimming pool? And Semtex does not explode when shot, that is Tannerite ... which you can buy by the pound at the store here in the states to blow stuff up for fun... and does make tree-stump removal easy. (Here is a real life paradox... We regulate fertiliser purchases because it can be a chemical explosive when combined with diesel... but you can buy this cool powder stuff that blows up when shot... no questions asked. 'Merica!!! ).

\---

Did you know that normal Mercury isn't really very poisonous in real life and that it cannot be "painted" onto candy wrappers?

If the children were left alone and not restrained in any way... why did they not just leave the "Old candy factory" and run away?

"No, this boy is smart, reads all those spy novels..."

But, then just sits there waiting for rescue eating mercury flavoured sweets?

\---

Why on earth did Sherlock think a passenger in the cab could be the murderer?

Cabs do not pick up second and third random fares when occupied... that little "engaged" light is there for a reason... so others will know the cab already has a fare. (If you want group transport the Busses and Tube is the way to go.).

In what world did Sherlock consider that the bad guy was engaging in ride-share to hunt for people to kill? Does that not leave a problematic string of witnesses coming forward after each death? "Yeah, Bloke in my cab wanted to share the fare with the victim... He rode around for three hours, suddenly told me to pull over. He offered this guy a ride, and I dropped them off at the pool... the meter was at two thousand quid by then and he only tipped me a fiver!"

\---

John's Doctorly skills in every episode... frankly suck. He had Sherlock hold his dirty (God knows where that scarf has been considering Sherlock's propensity to skips, sewers, and biohazard living) scarf to Bainbridge's wound! While he ordered "call an ambulance ". He should be on the phone with emergency services rattling off vitals and doing what he can to keep wet naked victim from expiring from shock.

Sherlock has to call his own ambulance and the makeup department did such a good job showing the audience that Sherlock's about to die...Mrs. Hudson brought our attention to it as well, just in case anyone out there missed Sherlock's pale sweaty skin and shallow rapid breathing and deep bruising under the eyes. I get that John and Mary were livid... but some Nurse and Doctor team!

He was a surgeon of some sort and probably concussed at the time, but he did not even question that the trolley pushers did not use spinal protocol? They plopped him on that medical trolly and did not even strap him in. John did not throw a fit that if he'd been alive, they just murdered him. He did not follow them in, giving them a medical history. If Sherlock was Dead On Scene, then he was not a patient any longer but a crime scene and they would have erected a tent and waited for SOCO to examine him. John did not notice.

\---

Did anyone read the side effects of H.O.U.N.D.?  
Permanent brain damage.   
Sherlock read them.  
He tried to give the stuff to John anyway....  
If the stuff is airborne and leaking... why were the bunny men in white not crazy too? The lab was empty at that moment but had obviously been in use up to that time.

A guy blew up in the mine field.

The next morning, Lestrade is no longer there and on top of that, Mycroft did not deem Baskerville worthy of a visit when his little brother had been exposed to this chemical sh!tstorm... twice? Nope, he is watching Jim get slapped around and matchmaking? He introduced his sister to Jim and his brother to Irene Adler...Christmas cheer to all his siblings. Teach them to ruin Christmas dinner at a whole new level.

\---

We all saw Sherlock leave the wedding... but he forgot his violin? ( Would have been a wonderful excuse for John to have to seen him before his Sex Holiday. Shocked nobody has written a steamy cheat fic based on that).

  
\---

The wedding photographer justified killing Sholto because he had let his brother die. How did he justify killing (or trying to kill) a random soldier? He was willing to murder him when he had never done a thing to him?

In the first place that makes him far worse than Sholto. But, the really weird thing is Johnathon Small failed to kill his practice round, yet did not change his process of death to reflect the fact it did not work the first time?

On top of that, if you could not feel a skewer enter your body just by wearing a belt... should we not be exploring this medical miracle of pain management elsewhere? Even if my shoe is very tight, I still feel the nail go through my shoe, into my flesh and my foot hurts.

\----

Sherlock did not notice Jim was his cabbie.

The standard procedure in London is that you bend to a cab and politely ask the cabbie if he can take you to such and such before you enter the vehicle. So, sure, I will give you that Sherlock was a distracted rude dog and hopped in and bellowed "Baker Street" but Jim could not have had a sniper on every rooftop in London and Sherlock could have noticed him any second (you can see the driver, if nothing else in the mirror).

So, the guy who saved Sherlock is shot at this random place he is dropped off and Sherlock does not duck, take cover or warn magic appearing John that there is an active shooter... they had no idea if it was related to them or just some random madman who happened to be taking shots at passerby!

Sherlock just stands there making a spectacular target. If I were a killer, I would have at least taken a few pot shots at his feet... just to make him dance?

John, as ever the Doctor, immediately kneels to see if he can help the shot bloke on the ground... oh wait... he did not even glance at him or take his pulse. (And the combat veteran does not drag his friend to cover)

\---

After Battersea Power Station, how did Sherlock make it back to the flat before John?  
Sherlock appeared to be walking in a daze and John was in the Adlermobile? Who Should have arrived home first unless John shagged Kate and or Irene on the way back to the flat?

Sherlock had time to rescue Mrs. Hudson, beat up the CIA guy and call Lestrade before John managed to get home.

\----

Moriarty made it to the flat after getting released from a trial and signing paperwork when John was rushing directly out of court agitated and warning Sherlock that Jim was going to come after them, before John got home!

John has no time management skills if Sherlock has time to have tea with Jim before John ever shows up.

\---

These are just a few examples to show you that no.. Series 4, on the whole, was not that much less coherent than the others.

One last point that nobody else seems to use to justify that thinking John may be in a coma or something is not the most irrational thought in the world is Hell.

Mary told Sherlock in her DVD

"Go to hell, Sherlock "

Then... after John is shot by his therapist/mistress, Mycroft has his clown encounter and comes to sit in the chair at Baker Street and says...

"Heaven may be a fantasy for.... but I can give you the map coordinates of Hell"

He even talks about demons!

If John lies in hospital somewhere near death, might that not explain exactly what he is seeing?

He is wounded... fading and his mind is misfiring.

He knows Mycroft works in "the circus" (MI6) and there are scary clowns.

Mycroft escorts them to the gates of hell for   
"Judgement ". If anyone could know the way to get to hell, it would be Mycroft.

They blow up. Or take a leap of faith through fire. (John is dead and can never go home again... Baker Street is lost)

They go on a boat ride across a raging sea full of fog and mist. (Symbolism of the river Styx)

They descend into the underworld of Sherrinford.

John meets a frightening female version of Sherlock. (More aligned with how John Writes Sherlock's personality than the truth of him) She plucks at his heart (liver) like a Harpy.

 

She cruelly tests him, weighing his heart.

The first test is if he can take an innocent life. He does not.

The second test is righteousness ... when the wife is killed, John rages at injustice.

The third test is if he serves justice during tribulation. He helps Sherlock to the best of his ability in solving the murder.

The forth test is does he believe in mercy... he advises Sherlock not to condemn the man. (Judge as you wish to be judged).

The fifth test is loving unselfishly. (He supports Sherlock in his saving of Molly and in comforting him when Sherlock breaks down)

Sixth... He shows his honour by agreeing readily to die without reservation to Save Sherlock and Mycroft.

Seventh- Hope.   
He is in a deep hole and there is no hope left, the water and the cold are closing in and Even Sherlock is frolicking in a cemetery that does not exist. Can John find hope and if he does, can he pull himself out of the well of sorrow and come back to life? ( For Sherlock it is a staircase)

Then we see a montage of all the things John actually has to live for...his future if he decides to live.

This is probably just musing since we did not get a Lost Special. But considering the first two episodes revolved around an appointment in Sumarra, is it really so very beyond incredibly that some of us inferred that Sherlock could have been foreshadowing not his own death (Which he boldly chases at every opportunity despite his admitted fear) but instead, foreshadowing the thing he fears most? The death of those he loves most in the world is what Sherlock fears.

His conversation with "Faith" tells us that.

Your death happens to other people.

He has lost Mary who he cared for very much and now The Death of John is deeply on his mind as a probable outcome to be expected. That is a fear well beyond his own death. Mary gone in an instant brings it home that He could lose John in a second too.

They can still save this mess if they get the opportunity with a series 5 that opens to John near death and Sherlock sitting by the bed telling John of all the things he has to live for.

Cut to Mary telling him to,"Get on with it."

Fade to John groaning and opening his eyes to find a wrecked Sherlock still believing in his John.

Montage of physical therapy and John working his way back to being the man he wants to be and jump to the first case and their Joy that they have made it and are back! ( Be that best friends, bromance, romantic entanglements or just two idiots never quite explained... it could all still be good again).

Series 4 is problematic in so many ways, but, in others it does have it's hot mess brilliance as well.

 


End file.
